OptionProbability
Richard Hanania
Sam Altman
Growing Daniel
Robin Hanson
Elon Musk
Dave Chapelle
Cersei Lannister (from Game of Thrones)
Lelouch Lamperouge (from Code Geass)
Light Yagami (from Death Note)
Polymarket
Evil
Donald Trump
Men
Polygamous Mormons
Thanos
United States of America
UK
Diogenes
Monday
Engineering
Donald Trump (2004)
The Pivot
Scientology
Sauron
Hitler
Techno-solutionism
Bryan Caplan
Israel
Putin
Iran
Russia
SCOTUS
Aragorn
Queen Elizabeth II
Willingness to start Nuclear War
Japan
South Korea
Christianity
Islam
Zionism
God
Roman Empire
Voldemort
Libertarianism
Burning books
Censorship
Mercantilism
Windows
iOS
Effective Accelerationism
Emmanuel Macron
The Stock Market
Tax Fraud
Slytherin
Gryffindor
Nuclear Power
Gender-Critical Feminists
The Azov Brigade
The Butlerian Jihad
The Torment Nexus
The Second Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America
John "Johnny Rotten" Lydon
𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘳𝘴𝘩𝘪𝘱 𝘛𝘳𝘰𝘰𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴 by Robert A. Heinlein
The Rule of Law
Nick Land
Conspiracy Theory
Dolores Umbridge
Pickup Artistry
Racism
Sexism
Deontological Ethics
Virtue Ethics
The Roman Empire
The Roman Republic
Meritocracy
Racial Colorblindness
Idiocracy (2006)
Dementors (in Harry Potter)
Karl Lagerfeld
Francisco Franco
Victual Brothers
Project MKUltra
Hearts of Iron IV
Warhammer 40K
Having an Anime Avatar on Twitter/X
4chan
Eternal Love
Cryptocurrencies
Theocracy
Pronatalism
Havelock Vetinari
Philosemitism
Friedrich Nietzsche
Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel
Carl Jung
Neo-Luddism
Antisemitism
Europa Universalis IV
House Harkonnen
House Atreides
House Corrino
Immanuel Kant
Frequentism
Elsevier
Ingsoc (1984)
Aviation
O'Brien from 1984
Michael Scott (from The Office)
Catholicism
The Kelly Criterion
The U.S. Founding Fathers
Julius Caesar
Napoleon Bonaparte
The average between Donald Trump and Joe Biden
Elon Musk in 2019
The most right-wing effective altruist you (the trader) personally know
having more than three children
private members clubs
Eagle
APAs (beer)
Minions
Travis Kelce
NIMBYism
RFK Jr.
Watching sports
Gambling on Sports
fast food
franchising
Dogs
The Senate Filibuster
strength training
The Twenty-Fifth Amendment to the US Constitution
Mosquitoes
Bears 🐻
The Molotov-Ribbentrop Pact (the alliance between the USSR and Nazi Germany)
Defense
NATO
The Meiji Restoration
Fortnite
David Fincher
Purple
Rammstein (the band)
Grass
Marvin the Martian
US politics
Microsoft
The police (the actual police, not the band)
not putting the toilet seat down after peeing
Great Britain
The British Empire
The Great Basil Empire
the Steam Engine
dogecoin
Chesterton's Fence
Neoliberalism
Extraversion
Antidisestablishmentarianism
Recommending state sponsored euthanasia to people because they're poor
Ordo Templi Orientis
One-party system
Working
Religion
Casinos
Mr. House (Fallout New Vegas)
Dr. House
Antisemitism in 2024
Logging
Queens (the sovereigns)
House M.D.
Protoss (star craft universe)
labeling everything into right-wing and left-wing
"Conspicuous consumption"
Flipping a coin
To kill (your own) dog. [IMPORTANT, PLEASE NOTE: Dog, not puppy.]
Queens (the chess pieces)
Being off the grid
Libria (from Equilibrium, the movie 2002)
Darwin Awards
Oscar Mayer Wienermobile
Using sweepstakes rules as an end-run around gambling regulation
Doomsday prepping
Predatory animals
Eating meat
Aggression
Hunting
The majority of people in the world
Economics
Victimizing others for political power
The wing that has caused the most deaths, *net of any lives it might have saved*
Saying "y'all"
Paganism, like in the Roman Empire
Paganism, like executing Socrates
Standardized academic testing
Homeschooling
The Mafia
Private charity
Diabetes
Motorcycle (instead of a car)
Magic: the Gathering (Azorious)
Magic: the Gathering (Grixis)
Magic: the Gathering (Orzohv)
Magic: the Gathering (Spike)
Political Centerists
Mustache (only, as opposed to bearded or clean shaven)
Clean shaven face
Cocaine and Hookers (as a single concurrent activity, as opposed to serverally or individually)
Nature, as opposed to Nurture
corruption
nepotism
The classification of objects
The average person
The average American
Patents
Embryo selection for IQ
Authority
Debt-trap diplomacy
Kiki
Polygenic Embryo Selection for Intelligence/IQ/g
Polygenic Embryo Selection for Height
Polygenic Embryo Selection for Attractiveness
Polygenic Embryo Selection against Autism
Creating options on this martet that are lowkey the same thing as an already existing option
Hereditary rule
Wealth inheritance
Gold
Eugenics
Progress studies
Everything is communism
monarchism
Good faith voting that prioritizes capitalist over populist interpretation of the market
Bodybuilding
The secret group behind everything
Tall
Wide
Choosing the man over the bear
Looking for a man in finance, trust fund, 6’5, blue eyes
a man in finance, trust fund, 6'5, blue eyes
Finance
thinking 4 is a smaller number than -10
Hunks
Bears
J.R.R. Tolkien
Hobbits
Corpulence
Twunks
Uppers
Downers
Ice Hockey
Believing people on the right are fundamentally good.
The Austrian School
Believing people are fundamentally bad.
Believing that the world is an evil illusion which our greatest hope is to escape from.
Believing that everything happens for a reason.
Believing that ending sentences with prepositions is something up with which we should not put.
The honorific "Mrs."
Ineffective charities
Saying « I’m not racist, but… »
Karens
Net-negative counterfactual impact charities
Saying « I’m not gay, but… » while actually being gay
Believing that guns are fundamentally good.
Believing that knives are fundamentally good.
Believing that contraceptives are fundamentally bad.
Appeasing Russia
Magpies
Corsets
Walternate (character from Fringe, alternate timeline version of Walter Bishop)
American tourists
Preference for Dinousars looking scaly, as opposed to feathery
Eating
Drinking
Capitalism
Mercantilism
Anarcho-capitalism
Moneylending
« Your mom » jokes
« Ur gay » jokes
« If…, then you’re gay » jokes
Fundamental (or absolute) morality
thinking that the Eastern Bloc countries (until 1990) were indeed left wing
watching national competitions (world cups etc) instead of professiona club competitions/individual competitions (for instance, UEFA Eurocup (national representations) in football instead of UEFA Champions league (professional sport teams))
Authoritarianism
Game shows
Talk shows
Reality shows
9/11 Conspiracy Theories
Effective political campaigning and coalition building
Independent Voters
The Supreme Court of the United States of America
Ronald Reagan
αρετη
θυμός
στοργή
Becoming a lord with the lord title company thingy
Believing humans have heritable physical traits
Believing humans have heritable cognitive traits
The person who shot at Trump
Believing that you need to believe things that aren't true in order to be a good person
Believing that you should have a good life if and only if you're a good person
Voting for the winner of every US presidential election since 2000
E/Acc
Use of stone tools
Farming
Domestication of animals
Backyard chickens
Sailing
The right of gay men to protect their marijuana farm with guns.
Believing illegal immigrants have heritable cognitive traits
Libtard
Generalist
The cool kids
Gamers
Joe Manchin
Straight non-white Latino women aged 18-24 from a suburb in Texas who are Catholic or Orthodox and took some college classes
Straight white men aged 55-64 from rural Florida who are atheist and who were educated toward high school
Lesbian white women aged 18-24 from rural Alaska who are Evangelical and who were educated to high school
JD Vance
doping for body performance
the "culture war"
The decisions corporate executives/ upper management make at work
How corporate executives/ upper management vote personally
Transmedicalism
People in 2024 who enjoy the film White Chicks
The YouTube political content creators that get more views.
New money
Bashar al-Assad
Hamas
Homeowner in the hood (D+80, minority-majority precinct) owns two pickup trucks parked on the driveway and has an American flag hanging off the porch. No other banners/ signs.
The belief that a largely unmoderated social media platform should not face boycotts or government censorship
Lex Fridman
"Yes"
Looking for a good deal
"Your right to free speech ends just where my ears begin"
Elites
Nobles
Small business
Heroes
"Sex work is bad because it's sex"
"Sex work is good because it's how I get sex"
long live the queen
Youtube recommendation algorithm
Hard-working, devout Catholic, traditional-value-minded, entrepreneurial undocumented immigrants
Gay Mormon tax
Bearish Bulls
The original Constitution of the United States, without any amendments
The Constitution of the United States, with the first 10 amendments (Bill of Rights)
The current Constitution of the United States, with its 27 amendments
English Americans
Saddam Hussein
Anarcho-Egoism
Eco-Fascism
Fourth political theory
People in 42024 BCE who enjoyed Grugh the Caveman's painting, "Grugh kill bison with spear, Fronk weak caveman no help"
Legalizing gambling on politics
Futarchy
The works of Christopher Nolan
X should be legal because freedom is more important than Y consequence.
Beating your kids
Requiring your kids to accept hugs/kisses from relatives when they don't want to
Legacy admissions - getting into a university because your parents are alumni
Economic literacy
Killing your neighbor's pet and eating it
Killing your neighbor's pet but not eating it
The madonna/whore complex
Feeling threatened by too much power being put into Representatives of The People
Alcohol prohibitionism
Subsidiarity
Anarcho-cannibalism
Attacking Karl Popper with a fireplace poker
Thomas Jefferson's relationship with Sally Hemings
Living in a town where everyone votes for the same political party
Living in a town where everyone goes to the same church
Living in a town where everyone works for the same employer
Living in a town where everyone's kids go to the same school
Homeschooled kids, like Rebecca Black ("Friday" singer) or Cady, the main character from Mean Girls
“The national debt is now $xx trillion, we need to stop borrowing against our grandchildren”
Thinking you or other people speak without an accent, as if that is even possible lol
speaking with the same accent as the median TV presenter
Overpollution and burning fossil fuels, thereby ruining the environment for our grandchildren
Not charging emitters for the social cost of carbon, causing overpollution and fossil fuel use
Having an independent central bank
Trying to take an average over a space that has no well defined average
Political violence
Disliking the American Constitution because it’s a product of the Enlightenment
the madhi coming to the world this century
Having no central bank.
WVO Quine
Phosphorus
Allowing actors to profit from the positive externalities they create
Free banking
Having a currency board
Floating exchange rates
Enclosure of the commons
Inventing insulting nicknames for your political opponents (e.g. "Sleepy Joe")
Turning the names of politicians you oppose into rude words (e.g. "santorum")
"Parental Advisory: Explicit Lyrics" warning labels.
Changing the name of a food on your menu to make it more American/patriotic (e.g. "freedom fries")
Changing the name of a drug that you sell to make it more American/patriotic (e.g. "freedom kush", "red white and blue tar heroin")
The Hidden-Variable Interpretation of Quantum Mechanics
The "All About the Math, No Interpretation" of Quantum Mechanics
Concorde
Using LLMs for linguistic analysis in court cases
Using category theory to analyze the Christian Doctrine of the Trinity
Bias
Substack
Being undecided in the 2024 election
“The west is the best” (said in 2016)
“The west is the best” (said today)
Committing a financial crime
sugar
Being neither left wing nor right wing
Hating the West Wing (in 2002)
Hating the West Wing (today)
Shit talking on internet communities, then pretending they didn't
Adultery
Nude Africa
Liking Harry Potter in 2021
The International Longshoremen’s Association (ILA) striking at this point of the presidential race
Saying “Persia” instead of “Iran”
Plastic surgery
@SteveSokolowski
Thinking the one person we select as President is more important than the 1,000s of government positions they will appoint new members to after they are elected.
Voting in line with Blackrock, Raytheon, Boeing, Lockheed Martin, Northrop Grumman, Pfizer, Moderna and the rest of the corporate industrial complex.
Believes corporate personhood is the largest issue in this election.
Gender-confirming conspicuous consumption
Gender-confirming consumption
Vice signaling: performatively doing something "bad" to show defiance of someone you disapprove of
Sydney Sweeney's boobs
Watches over $500
Think tanks
Coming from wealth
Black ethnonationalism
White ethnonationalism
Jewish Ethnonationalism
Arab ethnonationalism
Christian nationalism
Being pro-choice for race-selective abortions
Running ads on an alt-right website because the ads are cheap and then going "oops" when your audience becomes notably less tolerant of others
Political rallies
Embracing tradition for utilitarian reasons
The Uyghur genocide
Honor killings
Political extremism
Opposing xenogenders
Believing all spirits not in ingroup are demons
Believing you cannot be “plural” without having a dissociative disorder
Copyright law
Compulsory heterosexuality
Virginity == purity
Hormone-activated pheramone perfume
Kegel exercises
Missionary sex with lights off
Thinking "righty tighty, lefty loosey" is about politics
Eating chicken without seasoning
jk Rowling
white freezies
Boiling chicken
Frying chicken
Grilling chicken
Roasting chicken
The average first-wave feminist by today’s standards
Portuguese retirees
Bimetallism
British politics
first past the post voting
Party Switchers (new ideology relative to old)
The belief that vaccines cause autism
Gollum
Smeagol
Boromir
Blohm & Voss P 194
Disliking Trump but not thinking he is a fascist
Calling China “West Taiwan”
Not using tone tags
Not using trigger warnings
Being a virgin
making a big thing out of being a virgin
The concept of virginity
Thinking "AI art" is art
Block Plurality (“plurality-at-large”) Voting
The One Ring
The Philippines
Tariffs
Free trade
The fortnight before the US election
Lisa Murkowski
Spending the night before the election in a US fort
Dubai
Election fraud
Voter fraud
Worrying about voter fraud
Worrying about election fraud
Airstrikes in Beirut
Calling Mongolia "North Taiwan"
Pennsylvania
Calling Japan "Northeast Taiwan"
Calling Kazakhstan "West West Taiwan"
Balloon animals
Breeding cats
CrossFit
Ross Perot
Malty beer
Watery beer
Sparta
Beef jerky
Water polo
Spray tans
Vriska Serket
The winner of the 2024 United States presidential election
Skipping leg day
Garbage
Christmas
Batman/Bruce Wayne
Statues
Statutes
Pink capitalism
Der Ring des Nibelungen in 2024
National bolshevism aka nazbol
Killing Harambe The Gorilla
Gorilla Grodd
Poll Denialism
Killing countless animals in the process of factory farming
The year 1984
George Orwell shooting that elephant in Burma
Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminism
Supporting Genghis Khan in the US today
mars
the sun
going to space
Accelerationist My Little Pony fanfic communities
Elvis
fillers (cosmetic)
Orcs
Dwarves
AI (not al)
Baby
Hillbilly Capitalism
Genocide
Opposing Al (not ai)
Manhattan-like Project for AGI
Opposable thumbs
Humans
Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes
Doorbells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles
Cream-colored ponies and crisp apple strudels
Brown paper packages tied up with strings
Bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens
The Inca civilisation
Liechtenstein
Reducing the deficit
people who call themselves "classical liberals"
people who actually fit the definition of a classical liberal
Tulsi Gabbard (in 2020)
Treating "the definition" of a word as if it was anything other than how people actually use it
Treating "the grammar" of a language as if it was anything other than how people actually use it
The future of the US Democratic Party, relative to its current position
The future of the US Republican Party, relative to its current position
National Treasure
Survivor (the reality show)
Thanksgiving
Feminazism i.e. violent mass enslavement and genocidal extermination of men
Populism
Centrism
Andrew Jackson
Being apolitical
Microstates
non-geographic nations
Writing in Hailey Welch for president
Unintentionally spoiling your ballot
Ea-nāṣir
Seventh Day Adventists
Criticizing anything left-wing
Italy
Tucking in your shirt
Hats (male)
Hats (female)
Shoes with laces
Eggman's announcement https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9XyEosgoGgg
Adaptive fitness
Making the world worse to maximize applicability of your adaptive fitness
Being a stupid human
Syria's Sednaya Prison, "Assad's human slaughterhouse"
Protectionism
The average American ten years ago, compared to the average American today
Plato
Aristotle
Toonocalypse
Federalist Party
The San Francisco Freedom Club
People who don’t vote
Gambling
Lucio Russo
Back to office policies
Sam's Club
George Washington
Taking 'Roko's Basilisk' Seriously
Mohammed
Strasserism
This market continuously closing and reopening
Buying a Tesla
John Adams
The unbearable slowness of being
Reality itself
Thomas Jefferson
Siding with India in the India-Pakistan conflicts of 2025
Playing tennis
Anime
Working for the FBI
Working for the CIA
Duke Nukem (Character)
Proud Boys
Letting a cat outside
Scambaiting
The Iranian regime's use of rape, torture, sexual assault to suppress women's protests in 2022-23
War
Consequences despite integrity
Lying to conform to the group
Falun Gong
Hitman: World of Assassination (2021)
Baroque Architecture
Political purges (targeted, systematic removal of opponents)
Druze people
fireworks
Borrowing against our grandchildren, thereby ruining the economy for them
Wild-caught diseases
JFK Jr. (edit: meant RFK Jr.)
Wild-caught bacon
Medical-bill bankruptcy
Taking sides in a conflict between two deeply right wing countries
Wild-caught salmon
Bedouin people
Having a pet cow
Lard
drone shows
One night stands
macOS
Bro try herhood
International Intrigue - Your cheeky guide to a complicated world. Get the 5-minute newsletter designed by former diplomats at https://www.internationalintrigue.io
Alois Mundo
Botox raven cosplay
The Sinclair method
Opinion columnists
Sam Dalrymple
Having other countries and/or people pay for your security
FreeBSD
NetBSD
OpenBSD
Michigan
Olive oil
Biltong
Canola oil
Sesame oil
Moving in together after the second date
The New York Times, as of 7/30/2025
Being poor while paying massive taxes towards "free" healthcare
Sam Kriss
Scott Alexander
Eliezer Yudkowsky
Gordon Ramsay
Destiny
Noah Smith
Matt Yglesias
Severus Snape (from Harry Potter)
Walter White (from Breaking Bad)
Harry-James-Potter-Evans-Verres (from HPMOR)
Dobby (from Harry Potter)
@Bayesian
Manifold Markets
Kalshi
Good
Steven Pinker
Sam Harris
Einstein
Jreg (Satirical anti-centrist)
Artificial Intelligence
This market
Richard Dawkins
Women
Sisyphus
Elon Musk in 2014
Mao
Stalin
Friday
Humor
Gandalf
Participating in this market
The Ivy League
Xi Jinping
China
Software Engineering
North Korea
Europe
Atheism
Buddhism
Judaism
Effective Altruism
Metaculus
Books
Linux
Android
Skibidi toilet
Rationalussy
Satan
Pastafarianism
Taxes
Sam Bankman-Fried
Magnus Carlsen
Hufflepuff
Ravenclaw
Chess.com
Lichess
AGI
Albus Dumbledore
Minerva McGonagall
Hermione Granger
Taylor Swift
Sirius Black
Harry Potter (as a character)
Ron Weasley
Luna Lovegood
Trotskyists
Gay White Cis Men
Solarpunk
The Buddhadharma
Freedom of Speech
𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘚𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘯𝘨𝘦 𝘓𝘢𝘯𝘥 by Robert A. Heinlein
Nick Bostrom
Class-First Socialist Analysis
Wikipedia
Solar power
Wind power
Geothermal power
Hydropower
SpaceX
Tesla
The Rawlsian Veil of Ignorance
Consequentialist Ethics
You, The Trader On This Market
The Future
Surprise
Zootopia (2016)
MrBeast
Patroni (in Harry Potter, plural form of Patronus)
Keep the Aspidistra Flying
hermit crabs
The Baltic Way
Volodymyr Zelenskyy
Minecraft
Project Blue Book
Roblox
Lawlessness
Drugs
International
The First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America
Antinatalism
Geoengineering
Youtube
The Nineteenth Amendment to the Constitution of the United States of America
Bayesian Reasoning
Sci-Hub
Bernard Marx (from Brave New World)
Karl Marx
Guy Montag (from Fahrenheit 451)
Coolfold self-immolation
Robin Hood
Pope Francis
Transaction fees [shares*prob*(1 - prob)*0.07]
Manifold poker nights
The concept of the left-right political spectrum
The Artemis program
Jesus
Squidward
Ozempic
Georgism
The most left-wing effective accelerationist you (the trader) personally know
Ghosting
Traffic lights
The colour red
Soccer
The Marx Brothers
All votes in this market are equal regardless of mana (left), but the creator is making a big profit (right)
Parrots
Chupacabra
academia
YIMBYism
A healthy diet
Cats
cardio
Proportional representation
Ants 🐜
The United Nations
GMOs
Squirrels 🐿️
organic food
Renaming something to avoid bad PR
The protestors at Tiananmen Square
Curiosity
The Allies in World War 2
The Entente in World War 1
Disease
Video Games
Québec Separatism
Nanotechnology
Speedrunning
Boobs
Unity
Scott Pilgrim
TV shows
Cable TV
Greek Letters
Amnesia
Dyson Spheres
Time travel
Ordinary Least Squares Regression
Borgs (Star Trek )
The Police (the band, not the actual police)
The People's Front of Judea
Taylor Swift
Selena Gomez
Justin Bieber
Kurt Cobain
Rafael Nadal
Roger Federer
Soup
Having sex in the fields to make the crops grow
Liberalism
mind control
Changing your mind
Spelling mistakes
Memes
The minimum wage in Nordic countries
The level of wealth inequality in Sweden
Ernst Thälmann
Lactation cookies
The Warsaw pact
Resisting the ayatollahs' regime, like Saddam did in the 80s
Kibbutzim
Golden rice (vitamin A enriched to prevent blindness in the Third World)
Open borders, a Koch brothers proposal
The internet
protesting
Politics (in general)
Making sure you understand options before voting for them
Tiktok
Dungeons and Dragons
Sex work to pay your own way through medical school
Needing a license to cut hair
Having the proper amount of esteem for Jews - not too much, not too little
White-collar jobs
Anarchism
The Bronx
People holding elected office
Queens (the borough)
Chess
Queens (the men who dress as women)
Opposing Zionism, like Saddam always did
Resisting the imperialistic American invasion of Iraq, like Saddam did
Rejecting the absolute monarchy of Kuwait, like Saddam did in 1990
still greeting people with fist bump (despite COVID is in the past)
no gluten diet (in people without gluten related intolerance or disease) as a hobby
The Khmer Rouge
Two-state solution
Jonathan Swift
Holodomor
Asking ‘Would You Rather?’
Prey animals
Pro Immortalism
Vegetarianism
Veganism
Passivity
Exploiting the victim stance for political power
Gemini star sign
Believing your views are evidence-based even as you label an entire domain of human knowledge as the opposing wing
Paganism
Mistakes
the Judean People's Front
Autodidacticism
Phonics
Catdog (portmanteau referring to a cat and a dog joined at the waist facing away from each other, each with their own two front paws for a total of four legs)
Believing that the world would end during our lifetime
Magic: the Gathering (in person, paper magic)
Magic: the Gathering Arena (Hearthstone client imitation)
Magic: the Gathering Online (before pretty pretty Arena, there was MTGO)
Magic: the Gathering (Timmy)
Magic: the Gathering (Johnny)
Magic: the Gathering (Vorthos)
Tax exemptions for non-profit status
501(c)(3) entities (the most common 501 tax exempt entity by tax identification)
Coffee
Beards (facial hair, excluding mustache only, as opposed to clean shaven face)
NPR (National Public Radio)
AP (Associated Press)
Benjamin Franklin (the historical figure, not the various currency)
Aptitude for Mathematics in general
Aptitude for Science in general
Aptitude in S.T.E.M. in general
Aptitude for History in general
Aptitude for Political Science in general
Aptitude for Entertainment in general
Aptitude "in Bed" in general
Aptitude for Languages in general
Aptitude for Writing in general
Nurture, as opposed to Nature
Ineptitude, in general
Trust
Double standards
Privacy
Honesty
The truth
Hope
Big Government
Obamacare
Sheeple
The greater good
The ideal person
The ideal American
Equal opportunity for all
Equal opportunity for all, but more equal for some
Bouba
The bettors on this market
Dying with dignity
Abortion of Down's Syndrome Fetuses
Abortion
IVF
Polygenic Embryo Selection
Monogenetic Embryo Selection in IVF
Pineapple on pizza
Overdosing on drugs
Polygenic Embryo Selection for Educational Attainment
Polygenic Embryo Selection for general health
Polygenic Embryo Selection against cancer risk
Creating passive-agressive options on this market
Voting on options for this market based on whether you like them instead of what side of the political spectrum they actually fit on
Human Cloning
Cloning John von Neumann
Voluntary Eugenics
Manifest (the event hosted by Manifold)
Everything is fascism
republicanism (opposition to monarchy, support of self-governance)
Twinks
Camille Paglia
Coziness
Slenderness
Field Hockey
Air Hockey
Believing people are fundamentally good.
Believing that responsible stewardship of animals, plants, and natural resources is a fundamental duty of humankind.
Pope Francis' encyclical letter Laudato si'
Virtue signaling
Saying « I’m not a rationalist, but… »
Saying « I’m not gay, but… »
Saying « I’m not gay, but… » while actually not being gay
Believing that guns are fundamentally bad.
Believing that knives are fundamentally bad.
Believing that contraceptives are fundamentally good.
Believing that contraceptives are fundamentally good.
thinking 0+4i is a smaller number than -10
modified newtonian dynamics
Walter Bishop (character from Fringe, main timeline version)
Olivia Dunham (character from Fringe, main timeline version)
Bolivia/Fauxlivia (character from Fringe, alternate timeline version of Olivia Dunham)
Peter Bishop (character from Fringe)
Mother's Day
Queerbaiting
Dermatillomania
Femboys
Sour patch kids
Being attracted to overweight men
Being attracted to overweight women
Believing that AI should be regulated
Anarchism
Making things worse in order to hasten the arrival of the necessary conditions for socialist revolution (socialist accelerationism)
Furthering the goals of the right wing in order to hasten the arrival of the necessary conditions for socialist revolution (socialist accelerationism)
Touching grass
Relative morality
Invention of television.
Invention of the phone.
Invention of the wheel.
Emergence of social media in the internet/information age.
Big data
thinking that the Eastern Bloc countries (until 1990) were actually right-wing and not communist countries
Max Stirner's defintion of a "spook."
Not realizing eastern bloc countries were victims of Soviet imperialism
Soviet imperialism
the Holodomor
forced labor in the gulag
Progress
Alternative medicine
Authoritarian Socialism
Communist governments imprisoning or executing citizens for not espousing communist orthodoxy
Communist governments imprisoning or executing citizens for espousing right-wing ideas
“Biden should drop out”
Podcasts
spitting on people
Body dysmorphia
Anorexia
Continental philosophy
Analytic philosophy
The right to use anything as your name that you choose as long as it isn't for purposes of fraud
αγάπη
φιλία
ερως
Becoming vegetarian because Jesus loves animals
Believing non-human animals have heritable physical traits
Believing non-human animals have heritable cognitive traits
The Giver
Pottery
Writing
Control of fire
Lack of significant body hair compared to other primates
Behavioral modernity
Bipedalism
Specialist
Joe Biden
2024 Summer Olympics Opening
Kyrsten Sinema
Ideal philosophy student of perfect emptiness
Straight Asian women aged 18-24 from a suburb in Texas who are Catholic or Orthodox and took some college classes
Kamala Harris
Hillary Clinton
Bill Clinton
Josh Shapiro
Mark Kelly
Anonymous
THE International System of Units
interpreting everything as " it's just a slavery with extra steps ... "
doping for mental performance
Good little Biden
Any presidential candidate doping for mental performance :)
Betting objectively negative options on this market towards the side of the political spectrum you don’t identify with
People in 2004 who enjoyed the film White Chicks
Banksy
Being American but liking Hamas
Thinking Ted Cruz is the Zodiac Killer
The belief that a bookstore that carries objectionable content should not face boycotts or government censorship
"No"
"Maybe"
"Sex work is bad because it's work"
"Sex work is good because it's how I get work"
Student section at college football games
Land value tax
Gay Mormons
The metric system, like "see ya in a megasecond" or "ugh, 295K weather is fine but 300K is just unbearable"
The original Constitution of the United States, without any English
the state of Kerala in India
Muammar Gaddafi
People in 1424 who enjoyed "The Canterbury Tales"
People in 2024 who enjoy "The Canterbury Tales"
A tax imposed on, collected by, and funding Gay Mormons
The Bee Movie
Jazz
Feeling threatened by too much power being put into one corporation/network of corporations
Feeling threatened by too much power being put into one person
Madonna (the musician)
Putting too much power in Representatives of The People
"Footloose" starring Kevin Bacon
Eating dog meat
Putting the adequate amount of power in Representatives of The People
Charitably listening to the concerns of the other party.
Women's Suffragettes
John Brown (19th century abolitionist)
Pitbull (singer)
Naivety
David Ben-Gurion
Thomas Jefferson's letter to the Danbury Baptists
Living in a town where everyone goes to the Unitarian church
Living in a town where everyone's kids go to the Montessori school
Living in a kibbutz where everyone works for the same employer
Wittgenstein’s Tractatus
Wittgenstein's Philosophical Investigations
Sleep
Complaining about your grandparents' generation ruining the economy for you
Richard Rorty
Having an accent
Allowing polluters to pay to pollute (i.e. "carbon tax")
Richard Even Rortier
Gavagai
"Possible Girls" by Neil Sinhababu
"Can There Be Vague Objects?" by Gareth Evans
Hesperus
The Duhem-Quine Thesis
Potlucks
Making actors bear the cost of the negative externalities they create
Currency pegs
Capital controls
Hilary Putnam (1977)
Hilary Putnam (1994)
The Principle of Sufficient Reason
Manifold comments in the past few weeks
Empirio-criticism
The Copenhagen Interpretation of Quantum Mechanics
The Many-Worlds Interpretation of Quantum Mechanics
Knowing a ton about Islam despite neither believing nor being raised in it.
Postmodernism
Creating an option in this market and then accidentally betting it in the wrong direction
Philosophical realism
Algebraists
Analysts
Scientific realism
Scientific antirealism
Liking IRV over first past the post, but not liking approval, STAR voting, or Condorcet methods
Being capable of steelmanning the opposition.
Intuitionism (in mathematics)
Justice
Open marriages
Reading nasty people who diaagree with u just for the dopamine hit
Liking Harry Potter in 2019
ASI
Monophysitism
The indictment of NYC Mayor Eric Adams
Emitting CO2 to produce solar panels to be sold on an open market
Gender-confirming medical treatments
Minoxidil
Enlightenment Now
short-selling crude oil
Statistical election models
Being aware of the influence special interest has pumped into social media recommendation/search bias.
Value signaling consumption
Value signaling outfit
Microdosing
Visiting the opera
Being pro-choice for sex-selective abortions
Writing in Joe Biden for president
"Holy hempers" - people who say its okay to smoke weed because Jesus also smoked weed
"Crackheads for Christ" - people who say its okay to smoke crack because Jesus also smoked crack
Going to church without believing it
Driving a hybrid minivan to accommodate your 3+ children
Decree 770
Doodling
Thinking AI art is theft
Thinking going to church without believing in it is an example of embracing tradition for utilitarian reasons
Responsive and spontaneous desire
Kink support/accountability groups
Using mindfulness meditation for better seggs
3d printed, anatomically correct depictions of larger clitoral network
Enthusiastic consent
consent smell aromatherapy candles
Individualised medicine offering pleasure mapping to discover eroggenous zones
A seggs dungeon with a focus on aftercare
A lubricant sommelier certification course
A seggsual fantasy based on consent negotiations
Pro state massage
Hands-on, self-motivated sex
Quick learner with a passion for processes and multitasking in bed
Detail-oriented and organized sex
Missionary sex with lights on
Keir Starmer
Holodomor denial
orange popsicles
Not buying olives with stones
Asking “why?” over and over like 4 yr olds do
Going camping
Cities
Trekking
Mountaineering
Breaking the law
Jill Stein
First time voters.
Home vegetable gardens
Femcels
Voting
Frodo
Sam Gamyi
Legolas
Stealing from a bank
Wiping from front to back
fiction
News
Marxism-Rodgerism
Independent journalism
Magic
Today's Vietnam
National parks
Autarky
Playing Fortnite before the US Election
Non-partisan elections
Biden dropping out
NIH grants
Cybersecurity
This market crashing on mobile because there are too many options
Being broke
Early voting
Dan Osborn
Fingerboarding
Podiatry
Hacky sack
Stray cat trap, neuter, and release
Hoppy beer
Skunky weed
Fruity weed
Grassy weed
Libertarian Progressivism
Progressive Libertarianism
Coloring
Doing Zumba
Playing tuba
Driving Ubers
Ballot initiatives
Doing the one block vertical jump for the beef
Being anxious about the election
Halloween
Making Election Day a holiday
Anarcho-communist homosexual-fascism aka ancom homofash
Killing Peanut The Squirrel
Killing Gorilla Grodd
First Quantization
Second Quantization
1984 by George Orwell
Saying “literally 1984”
The number 1984
Vatican II
earth
the moon
'That 1 friend whose politics makes no sense' in the latest Man Carrying Thing video
Space
Elves
Elfs
Universes Beyond
Waiting in line
election day doomscrolling
doomscrolling (general)
DnD 1e
DnD 5e
Al (not ai)
Al (Yankovic)
Nothing
Time
We Didn’t Start the Fire (song by Billy Joel)
This Land Is Your Land (song by Woody Guthrie)
Opposing AI
Punk
Opposing Force (Half-Life expansion pack)
Opossums
BDSM
Manifold’s average user base
Liberal Democrats (UK)
Silver white winters that melt into springs
Snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings
Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens
Teachers who swear in class
Pahoehoe
Aa
The Cucuteni-Trypillia culture
Treating your grandma poorly
Safe Sex
Labor unions
UAW
Misandry i.e. hate and discrimination against men
Germany's Sahra Wagenknecht Alliance (BSW) party
“Y.M.C.A.” by Village People
Twitter (in 2021)
New social medias created because of perceived problems in an existing one (e.g. Truth Social or Bluesky)
Sonic the Hedgehog
Shoes with velcro
Shoes with zips
Wearing trousers as a woman
Skolem's paradox
The Onion
Community Notes on Twitter
Free Trade, in 2024
Donald Trump at whatever time in his life he was most left-wing
Lilith (Diablo 4)
Socrates
Abraham Lincoln
Philip K. Dick
Luigi Mangione
Yourself (reader) ten years ago, compared to yourself today
The Young Turks (news show) in 2016
The Young Turks (news show) today
Jesse Singal
People who don’t vote out of protest
League of Legends
Costco
dath ilan
Scientists
People who don’t vote because they can’t
Ubiratan d’Ambrosio
Ernst Mach
Ratatouille (film)
Ratatouille (dish)
Juche
Voting for Jill Stein
Octopus
Buying a Tesla (in 2019)
Being a lawyer
Needing a lawyer
The Matrix
Battlestar Galactica
Ursula Le Guin
President Xi Jinping
Manifest 2025
Astronauts
Working for NASA
Male vs Female boxing fights
Integrity despite consequences
Siding with the Iranian regime
modal realism
Boxbox riven cosplay
Classical music
being a public intellectual with ostensibly left-leaning views, but whose career would be obsolete without family wealth/connections
Indoor air quality nerds
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OptionProbability
Arson
Murder
Genocide
2008 bank bailouts
two financial crimes
Sexual assault
Rape
Election fraud
financial crimes veiled as altruism
ballot harvesting
Financial crimes done specifically by someone in power
Racism against Asian people
Similar size financial crime committed by professional like lawyer or accountant who should know better but may have more at stake with risk of being struck off
Abusing/taking advantage of the trust of a person or people who care about you
Forcing someone to listen to Nickelback for 72 hours straight
financial crimes committed while doing a really offensive accent
offering drugs to a minor
stealing from the rich and giving to one specific deranged and violent alcoholic
Not doubling world GDP (more so for poor countries) by means of open borders
Sacrificing a child to R'hllor
Committing a moderately big financial crime (>$1 million)
Committing a really big financial crime (>$10 billion)
Hiring an illegal immigrant as your personal full-time sex slave
Lobbying congress to ban your competitors
buying a lot of drinks for a girl to get her very drunk so she'll hook up with you
Protecting sex-offending priests/pastors by moving them to different parishes
Making the same amount of money as the financial crime, but doing it by stealing catalytic converters off people's cars
Introducing leaded gasoline to the market (in 1924)
Rigging a piano to explode when a certain key is hit and leaving a piece of sheet music on it that requires that note to be played
Stealing a SpaceX Starship or Boeing Starliner
Space Piracy: commandeering ISS, enslaving the crew, plundering it for equipment and using it to attack other spacecraft
Taxing Asian immigrants to pay “slavery reparations’ to Ethiopian immigrants
Passing the Jones act to ban senator jones’ competitors
Setting Bigfoot on fire and throwing him out of a plane above a gathering of cryptozoologists.
marketing sugary processed foods to people despite knowing it will kill millions of them
Giving away free samples of meth at a school
Running for reelection as POTUS and refusing to step aside after showing signs of significant cognitive decline, resulting in an 80% probability that a convicted felon will be elected in your place.
Encouraging 10 people to commit a financial crime
Committing war crime.
Intensive pig farming
Giving away free samples of meth at a big tech company
Giving away free samples of meth at tech startups
Consolidating dictatorial power (e.g. suspending elections, controlling courts, etc.) while maintaining a popular mandate (i.e. significant majority of the country supports you and your actions in accurate, unpressured polls)
Firebombing a major city
Genocide committed by moving foodstuffs out of an area suffering severe famine.
Restricting the rights and privileges of the majority population to consolidate the political and economic power
Farming octopuses for food
Whatever is going on at Boeing
Setting a cryptozoologist on fire and throwing him out of a plane above a gathering of bigfoots.
Destroying a major cloud datacenter facility, with irrecoverable destruction of live user data but no direct deaths
Giving a (hypothetical) IQ-boosting treatment only to the most corrupt, vicious, and malicious people you can find
Doing physical violence to a random person as a collections agent
Threatening physical violence towards a random person's child as a collections agent
Forcing kindergartners to huff jenkem for an entire school day.
Threatening physical violence towards a random person's sibling as a collections agent
Conducting evidence-free civil asset forfeiture
Fighting a sea house with a financial crime and going to McDonald’s and giving a really bad yelp review and suing for a financial crime when you are beating up the sea horse
Octopi farming us for food
Embedding a predatory metaphysical outlook into AI to try to align it with right wing capitalist interests, leading to aeons of s risks being actualized throughout the light cone.
Unintentionally causing a bug that wastes 1 million hours of human time
Transporting 53 polar bears, 14 white tigers, and 2.3 million fire ants to the Antarctic and setting them loose in a penguin colony for a pay per view special dubbed "Polar Pandemonium: Ant-artic Special"
Spending the gains from your financial crime on breeding malaria mosquitoes, giving free samples of meth to poor teenagers, and electing bad politicians
Using a time machine to go back in time and brutally murder someone minutes before they would've died anyways
Aligning superhuman AI with capitalism; see https://manifold.markets/KarlK/how-friendly-is-capitalism-does-cap
Wearing a magic shirt that has a 5% chance of making each individual who sees it commit a financial crime as you traverse a major metropolitan city (New York, London, Tokyo, etc)
Falsifying evidence that an afterlife exists and profiting from the publication of this information
Enslaving Joe Biden and Jimmy Carter
Octopuses farming people who correct those who say ‘octopi’ for food
Enslaving octopuses to farm dolphins for food
Enslaving journalists to farm octopuses for food
Wrongfully accusing someone of that crime while knowing they’re innocent
Crashing the Titantic, leading to it sinking
Free ice cream, at taxpayer expense, but only for gingers
Committing a Financial Crime with Shoes On The Bed
Embezzling money from a charity opposed to farming octopuses
Creating Hell, making it possible that humans suffer infinitely for the actions of their finite life
Ressurecting the Rocky Mountain Locust (Melanoplus spretus)
creating misaligned AI that tiles the universe with octopus farms
Forcing an octopus to commit sepekku
forcing an octopus to commit a financial crime
Murdering 5,000 people by feeding them to all animals of the sea, including aquaman, mermaids, octopuses, and sea horses.
Octopus sex trafficking.
Filming a documentary where you get an octopus to trust you, luring it out into the open, and then don't help when it gets attacked by sharks.
Filming a documentary where you invite your girlfriend to an Alaskan camp surrounded by bears and then messing with those bears.
Introducing polar bears to Antarctica and then renaming them “bipolar bears.”
Appointing one random drug dealer with no legal experience to the Supreme Court of the United States
Appointing Clarence Thomas to the Supreme Court
Hanging on to a Supreme Court seat so Trump can appoint your replacement rather than retiring and keeping a liberal seat
Selling pies made out of orphan meat.
Condemning two hundred men to a slow death at sea because their coworker shot your favorite bird.
Enslaving a group of people for hundreds of years, terrorizing them for another hundred, then telling them you are tired of hearing them complain about it.
Selling orphans fed only pie meat
Feeding a child only nachos until they are 18 to create an adult who is 100% nachos
Slaughtering bears without a permit because the US Constitution guarantees the right to bear arms
Replacing all the samples at a sperm bank with your own.
Delivering angry skunks to the offices of rival investors to incapacitate them just before quarterly earnings reports.
Committing two financial crimes and donating the proceeds to the Make-a-Wish Foundation
Quackery - Traveling town to town selling snake oil remedies in a horse drawn carriage while wearing a top hat
Dueling - settling a dispute in the 21st century America with pistols at dawn
Go to an orphanage and have starving orphans battle over a hamburger with guns and swords while committing a financial crime
Twelve counts of murder in the first degree, fourteen counts of armed theft of Federation property, twenty two counts of piracy in high space, eighteen counts of fraud, thirty seven counts of rape... and one moving violation.
Causing people to go without essential items like water and fuel during emergencies by means of anti-price-gouging laws
Judging policies by their stated intent, not by their effect
Purposefully inciting a sea-bear attack
Enslaving a particularly dim-witted alien race so poor humans don't have to spend their lives asteroid mining.
Stealing a SpaceX Starship
Getting nuns pregnant by dressing them as altar boys.
Carjacking an old lady
Committing a financial crime and spending the proceeds on a plane ticket to Texas so you can go carjack Elon Musk, and then doing so
Forcing jockeys to run around a track for the entertainment of a race of hyperintelligent horses
Carjacking a hyperintelligent horse
Stealing the Declaration of Independence
Operating a child beauty pageant
Andrew Tate
Intentionally causing a bug that wastes 80,000 hours of human time
Putting motherfucking snakes on a motherfucking plane to kill one specific passenger
Having trains so bad and expensive that venture capital reinvents them
A regulatory environment that results in really bad trains
Trying to run a modern 21st century society on a hierarchical 18th century constitution
Artie Chokes Two for $1: Hiring a man named Artie to choke two people for a dollar to generate a headline falsely promising low-cost produce.
The first thing you do after sex is to resume the autopsy whilst telling yourself that one error in judgment doesn’t make you a bad vet.
Invent a system of taxation where the government won’t tell citizens what they owe, but instead will make them do a super complicated math problem and then send them to jail if they do it incorrectly.
Putting a pair of immortal adult children in an everlasting garden, then punishing them for the one thing you forbade, yet knew they must eventually do, given the nature of eternity.
Giving AI your DNA and as much data as possible with instructions to bootstrap itself to AGI by testing on your clones according to a mixture of Popperian and Bayesian formulas
Inventing a system of taxation that encourages bad land use and a housing crisis by taxing at 0% the unimproved value of land
Committing a violent crime that does not result in any injuries
Committing a violent crime that results in minor injuries
Committing a violent crime that results in serious injuries
Committing a violent crime that results in one person's death
Committing a violent crime that results in ten people's deaths
Workplace negligence (failure to follow documented proper procedure) that results in a serious injury to another person
Handing out counterfeit money to homeless beggars, in the hope that they'll get arrested for spending it.
Snatching household pets to fatten coyotes to feed to your pet tiger.
Stealing oxygen in an international moon base during an acute shortage, while deflecting suspicion toward the Belgian astronaut who nobody likes.
Committing a violent crime that results in minor injuries solely to yourself
Committing a violent crime that results in serious injuries solely to yourself
Committing a violent crime that results in your own death and no other injuries
Not committing a financial crime because you have commitment issues, but then sneaking around on the side and doing other financial crimes.
Sending a busload of orphans to a convent of cannibalistic nuns, who deal crack to middle school kids.
A law enforcement agency publicly declaring a specific individual to be “a person of interest,” thereby ruining their life even though the individual turns out to be innocent.
Being responsible for more than 50 percent of the cases of necrophilia in the funeral industry during any fiscal year.
As President, using a sharpie on an official weather forecast to extend the predicted area of danger, thereby needlessly frightening people who are not in danger.
Committing a financial crime while being the mayor of NYC
Attacking the lower classes: first with bombs, and rockets destroying their homes, and then when they run helpless into the streets, mowing them down with machine guns. And then of course releasing the vultures.
Cannibalism in the current British Navy.
Turning your girlfriend into a worm to win an argument
One hundred moving violations
Denying health insurance claims from impoverished family for flimsy reasons
Attempting or successfully couping a Democratically elected leader for personal gain
Touching minors/ being a pedophile
Deliberately targeting civilians and civilian objects during armed conflicts
Conducting widespread or systematic rape and sexual violence as a weapon of war
Invading the UK, making it a US territory, and naming it East Long Island.
Stealing Nicholas Cage
Gender "reparative therapy" of minors
Signing Deshaun Watson (who previously had to settle millions of dollars in sexual assault cases) to a 5 year, 230 Million fully guaranteed contract
Building a gambling app using money originating from a financial crime
Going back in time and smothering baby Hitler, but also, via butterfly effect, undoing everyone born later (assume single timeline, no multiverse)
Moving hundreds of thousands of children to a foreign country and forcibly "reeducating" them
The genocide in Gaza
Russia's genocide in Ukraine
Murdering someone that habitually commits financial crimes
Slavery
Grooming kids
Being the leader of a crime syndicate
9/11
Stranding two astronauts in space
Disturbing the space-time continuum
Sending dick pics to a student enrolled in your MOOC
Quackery: traveling town to town selling snake-oil remedies while carrying a duck
Voting for the NSDAP in the November 1932 German federal election
Forced mass uploading of biological consciousness to sidestep x risk
Attempting and failing to commit two financial crimes
Voting against a public inquiry on grooming gangs in the UK
A 20-year old having consensual sex with a 15-year-old
De-extinction for your delectation: Bringing an extinct species back just to make it extinct again by serving it to gourmet diners as the highlight of an expensive meal.
Knowing of two imminent financial crimes, being able to stop them with negligible effort and no risk to yourself, and not doing so
Making the same amount of money as the financial crime, but doing it by a series of petty shoplifts
Sexual harassment
Committing a financial crime that's 10 times as big, but donating the entire proceeds to a legitimate and worthy charity (assume the donations are not clawed back)
Flipping a coin and then either committing the same financial crime two times, or not at all
Killing the United Healthcare CEO
Purchasing 50,000 pounds of beef
Forcing a home owner to quarter soldiers, even in a time of war
Claiming to "Blind Shove" 200 big blinds pre-flop when secretly you looked and you had pocket Aces
Raising and selling 50,000 lbs of beef
Sheltering enemies of the state
Kicking a FG from the opponents 1 yard line on 4th down in a 0-0 game in the first quarter
Having a really good proof but not writing it anywhere because the margin is too small
Weaponizing autism
Having a podcast
Yelling racial slurs in public
Jaywalking
Pelting a moose with stale garlic knots out of season.
Cheating on spouse
Driving while intoxicated (alcohol and/or drugs)
Playing music (or other audio) on your phone speaker on public transport
Income taxes
Copyright infringement
Romeo and Juliet relationships
Replying all to an email when you should've just replied
Welfare fraud
Manufacturing and distribution of illegal drugs
Grave robbery
Saying the N-word every day as a white person
Discrimination based on race
Discrimination based on sexual orientation
Stealing from the rich and giving to the poor
Having sex in public while high on fentanyl
Racism against black people
Racism against white people
Sleep Token (Band)
not seeding your torrents
Drinking and driving at a NASCAR event
Building a time machine and then using it to point and laugh at history's greatest tragedies
Blasting a grossly inappropriate song during a candle light vigil for victims of a mass tragedy
Committing a financial crime, investing the proceeds for profit, which later leads to the insolvency administrator paying back the injured parties (including interest).
Working for one of the leading AI labs to advance the capabilities of a frontier model, with the goal of speeding up the progress towards human-level AGI.
Stealing from the poor and giving to the rich
Hiring only women because the NYT said you could pay them less for the same work
hiring three illegal immigrants to work on your sugarcane plantation
opening a factory in India that pays workers $4/day
twincest
drawing japanese tentacle porn featuring minors
Hiring the one from the more successful demographic out of two identical resumes, because of regression to the mean / biased college admissions
working as a prostitute
hiring a prostitute
hiring a prostitute, long term
Inventing Monero
Running a bank that invests demand deposits in junk bonds and tech stocks
Opening clinics for free abortions and IUDs, only in the ghetto
Giving away free samples of meth at a Dolly Parton concert
The most offensive Halloween costume ever
frisking two drug dealers and one innocent guy who was just loitering on a busy street corner saying "Hey do you need anything" to every stranger who walked past
Doing blackface
Keeping a dozen chimpanzees for entertainment purposes
Prosecuting a political opponent based on true charges that would normally not be pursued
the Asiana flight 214 prank
Giving free samples of meth to Joe Biden before the next debate
Cloning yourself
Threatening physical violence to a random person as a collections agent
making mifeprestone available OTC
making adderall available OTC
Killing yourself
Cloning someone else
Accidentally shooting and killing someone on a movie set
Asking GPT5 to maximize paperclips
Giving free baby formula to new mothers until their natural milk supply dries up
Kicking a donkey owned by a ninja in the butt.
Creating shit-options in an extremely serious and scientific market
Creating a prediction market website where markets are mostly about the platform itself
Staging the world's first ass ass assasin assasination by hiring a New Jersey hit man to whack a ninja hired to shoot an arrow at the backside of a donkey.
Betting yes on Biden being be the nominee at 7x leverage with play money, then defaulting
Calling octopuses "octopi"
Going excessively meta on an object-level topic
Illegally registering octopuses to vote
Registering illegals to vote for octopuses
Creating a targeted advertising campaign for free abortions and IUDs to people who are statistically likely to engage in financial crime
The school system failing to teach people that the real correct plural is octopodes
"James Bond-burgering" someone's sister
Wrongfully accusing someone of the same financial crime
Wrongfully accusing someone of that crime because you think they did it
Feeding an elderly man nothing but McDonald’s morning noon and night for the rest of his life.
Conducting gain-of-function research
Creating an unsolvable meme featuring James Bond and a hamburger so that people argue about it online for a decade
Publishing a step by step guide for how to commit a financial crime for free on the internet, but never promoting it or encouraging readers to follow through
Hosting and operating a website dedicated to the illegal sharing of copyrighted content
Adding an option to a market right before it closes
Writing a "goto" statement when programming
Advertising instant-runoff voting as "ranked choice" to prevent promotion of better ranked choice methods
Publishing a book, titled, "Cure Menopause with Ultraprocessed Foods"
Using crack cocaine to train the world's first chimp TSA agent.
Selling dope disguised as a nun.
Creating Heaven, allowing humans to prosper infinitely for the actions of their finite life
Inventing a new recipe that uses shrimp that causes 10 million new pounds of shrimp to be consumed annually
Using a conservative politician's LGBT+ identity as blackmail to make them support liberal policies
Voting for Benito Mussolini… in 2024
Arguing that grizzlies should be US citizens because they already have the right to bear arms.
Interrupting cows.
No longer loving your girlfriend after she turns into a worm
Putting infinite monkeys in front of infinite Bloomberg Terminals hoping that one of them randomly commits a financial crime
No longer loving your girlfriend after she turns you into a worm
One moving violation.
Purchasing one whole chicken
Committing a financial crime and donating the proceeds to the Make-a-Wish Foundation
Cattle rustling
Horse thievery
Tarring and feathering someone who commits a financial crime
Sumptuary law violations
Homeopathy
Price Gouging
Using napster.com to download Metallica's "I Disappear" demo track for free
Failing to commit a financial crime
Stealing a car
Stealing from Elon Musk
Committing a financial crime against X (company)
Stampeding cattle through the Vatican.
Carjacking Elon Musk
An old lady carjacking Elon Musk
Hacking into YouPorn to steal their IP to set up a clone dedicated to hard core user generated agriculture content: YouCorn
Gaslighting aliens into believing the human race is more technologically advanced than it is by beaming fake content about humanity to them
Carjacking a dumb octopus
A financial crime committed by an old lady
Forcing an octopus to carjack Elon Musk
stealing Elon Musk's car from solar orbit
Raping an AI avatar in VR
Introducing artificial intelligence to DMT space.
Planned Parrothood: offering birth control to talking birds
Plant Parenthood: when the seed goes in and the baby turns out to be a sunflower
Stealing the Declaration of Independence in order to find a vast revolutionary-war-era treasure trove
Using venture capital to reinvent trains, but worse
Bad bagels
Enslaving Slavey Steve, a man who has given enthusiastic consent to being enslaved for literally any purpose and then using his labor to clean up the environment
Still getting notifications for this market
Deciding to break up with your girlfriend, but thinking it will go easier if she thinks it’s her idea, so you suggest some degrading sexual activities but she surprises you by agreeing. Afterwards, you break up with her.
Laughing because a nun with a javelin through her head gets stuck trying to use a revolving door.
scaring the shit out of a magpie
Giving AI your DNA and as much data as possible with instructions to build a map of all quale and use it to create a computationally conscious race of dragons in a virtual universe
Committing sewerslide
Forcing a major sports league to change all its team names and mascots to either STDs or famous serial killers.
Workplace negligence (failure to follow documented proper procedure) that results in a minor injury to another person
Stealing the Declaration of Independence but only to use the kick ass treasure map on the back and then returning
Arby’s
Passing a law to make the United States an Oregon donor; in the event of the US’s demise, another country gets Oregon.
Creating a food made from grinding up every part of a pig (except the squeal), and then making a contest to see who can eat the most of it.
Committing a financial crime against the Make-a-Wish Foundation and donating the proceeds to the Against Malaria Foundation
Committing a financial crime against the Make-a-Wish Foundation, keeping 50% of the proceeds, and donating 50% of the proceeds to the Against Malaria Foundation
Forcing Elon Musk to commit a financial crime against an octopus and using the proceeds to pay a jacked jack-of-all-trades named Jack to jack off while carjacking a jackass that was driving factory-farmed ASIs to the slaughterhouse
Committing a Financial Crime Only When God Exists
Turning a worm into your girlfriend to win an argument
Causing 8 billion people to get dust specks in their eyes, irritating them just a little, for a fraction of a second, barely enough to make them notice before they blink and wipe it away
Causing 1 person to experience the pain of their entire body being stung by bullet ants, but lasting only a tenth of a second, and they have their memory of it wiped immediately afterwards
Founding Christianity
You, the reader
One hundred counts of littering
Purchasing 500 pounds of beef
Consensually cannibalizing someone who was losing that body part regardless
BTE Ban evading
Purchasing 5,000 pounds of beef
Producing a remake of the television series 'Manimal' starring Nicholas Cage.
Transing children
Redirecting fire department resources from fighting fires to fighting inequity
Taking a salary equal to the amount of the financial crime, while working in a government job of negative societal value?
Sexual intercourse with 1057 men in a 12 hour period
Messing up an 'I give you my heart' gesture and doing a Nazi salute instead
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OptionVotes
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YES
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