Cracked News

January 20, 2029 (Whole term)

January 20, 2026 (First year)

January 20, 2025 (Inauguration Day)

February 20, 2025 (First month)

At least one victim dies

A member of a federal intelligence organization asks for the public to submit tips

Shooter is a white male

Suspect is linked to another shooting

Shooter dies prior to capture

Shooter motivated by antisemitic or anti-Israel sentiment

Shooter has a manifesto

At least one other perpetrator/conspirator involved

At least one victim specifically targeted

Shooter had left-wing politics

Shooter is not caught by 12/25

Shooter is not motivated by politics

Shooter is a muslim

Shooter’s motive is related to physics

Trump uses this shooting to crack down on immigrants, crime, or “the left”

Is a resident of Rhode Island

Shooter had right-wing politics

The shooter is classified as an nihilistic violent extremist

Shooter a current/former Brown student

Shooter a current or former Brown employee

Shooting was a targeted attack on the Uzbek victim.

Shooting was a targeted attack on Ella Cook.

Shooter motivated by HR grievance against Brown (eg layoff)

At least 3 students killed

Shooter used an assault weapon

Shooting is the deadliest of 2025

At least 10 people killed

At least 20 people killed

YES

YES

YES

NO

Quantum computing

New mathematics**

YES

NO

YES

YES

YES