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OptionProbability
AFC East: Buffalo Bills
AFC West: Kansas City Chiefs
NFC East: Philadelphia Eagles
AFC North: Baltimore Ravens
AFC North: Cincinnati Bengals
AFC South: Houston Texans
AFC South: Jacksonville Jaguars
NFC South: New Orleans Saints
NFC West: San Francisco 49ers
NFC West: Seattle Seahawks
NFC West: Los Angeles Rams
NFC North: Minnesota Vikings
NFC North: Detroit Lions
AFC East: New England Patriots
NFC South: Tampa Bay Buccaneers
AFC West: Denver Broncos
NFC South: Carolina Panthers
NFC East: Dallas Cowboys
NFC North: Chicago Bears
AFC South: Indianapolis Colts
NFC North: Green Bay Packers
NFC South: Atlanta Falcons
AFC West: Los Angeles Chargers
NFC East: New York Giants
AFC North: Pittsburgh Steelers
AFC West: Las Vegas Raiders
AFC South: Tennessee Titans
NFC East: Washington Commanders
AFC North: Cleveland Browns
AFC East: New York Jets
AFC East: Miami Dolphins
NFC West: Arizona Cardinals
67
57
56
46
44
43
40
40
37
33
31
31
30
29
26
25
25
24
23
19
18
10
9
9
8
7
6
6
5
4
3
3
OptionProbability
Scores over 23.5 points in Week 1
Wins a preseason game
Starting QB missed a game due to injury.
Starts season with Brandon Aiyuk
Wins a game by 25+ points
The team moves or is renamed before 2050
Any player is an MVP finalist
Any player wins MVP, OPOY, or DPOY
Shanahan is COY
Drafts at least one QB in the NFL Draft
Christian McCaffrey plays at least 12 games
2 wide receivers each have over 1000 receiving yards
Finish 24/25 regular season with a positive Rush EPA
Wins NFC West
Gets #1 Seed
Plays in NFCCG
Trade Deebo Samuel before the season ends.
Plays in a wildcard playoff round game
Enters the playoffs as a wildcard team
Wins 13+ regular season games
100
100
100
100
100
27
1
1
1
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
0
OptionProbability
35% or higher Kick Return rate
At least one missed kicking extra point attempt
Any team scores 24+ points before halftime
Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out
Pick Six
Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT
Any team scores 40+ points
At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose
Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game
Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes
Safety Scored
California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)
A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts
Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game
Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses
MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)
Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)
Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games
2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week
Will a championship belt change teams?*
A 4th and 11+ is converted*
At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards
Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)
Overtime
4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped
Punt or Kick Return Touchdown
Fake Punt
For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?
AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back
A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points
All Starting Rookie QBs lose
The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number
A player gets an Octopus
A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)
Fat Guy Touchdown*
Any 400 yard passer
Shutout
3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game
Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game
A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)
A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury
Any Double Digit Underdog Wins
Scorigami
For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name
A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)
Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game
Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game
All Starting Rookie QBs win
Highest Scoring Game of the Season (so far)*
87
84
80
78
77
74
71
70
68
62
54
53
53
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
48
47
46
46
45
45
45
45
43
41
41
39
39
38
37
37
34
33
32
24
24
22
18
18
6
OptionProbability
35% or higher Kick Return rate
At least one missed kicking extra point attempt
Any team scores 24+ points before halftime
Any team scores 40+ points
Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT
At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose
Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game
Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out
Pick Six
Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes
Overtime
AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back
Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game
Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses
MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)
Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)
Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games
2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week
Will a championship belt change teams?*
A 4th and 11+ is converted*
California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)
At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards
A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts
Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)
For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?
4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped
A player gets an Octopus
A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points
The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number
Punt or Kick Return Touchdown
3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game
Fake Punt
A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)
Fat Guy Touchdown*
All Starting Rookie QBs lose
Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game
A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)
Safety Scored
Any Double Digit Underdog Wins
A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury
A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)
Any 400 yard passer
Shutout
For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name
Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game
Scorigami
All Starting Rookie QBs win
Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game
Highest Scoring Game of the Season (so far)*
86
86
80
76
74
72
69
66
60
59
59
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
45
45
45
44
44
43
41
41
41
37
37
35
34
34
31
31
31
24
24
21
20
19
9
OptionProbability
35% or higher Kick Return rate
At least one missed kicking extra point attempt
Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out
At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose
Any team scores 24+ points before halftime
Pick Six
Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game
Any team scores 40+ points
Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT
Punt or Kick Return Touchdown
Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes
Fake Punt
Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game
Safety Scored
AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back
Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game
Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses
A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)
MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)
Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)
Any 400 yard passer
Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games
2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week
Will a championship belt change teams?*
A 4th and 11+ is converted*
California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)
At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards
Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)
For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?
All Starting Rookie QBs lose
4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped
3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game
Overtime
For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name
A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points
The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number
Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game
A player gets an Octopus
Scorigami
Fat Guy Touchdown*
A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury
A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)
Lateral caught at least 1 yard beyond the line of scrimmage (per gamebook) (non-last play of the game)
All Starting Rookie QBs win
A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts
Shutout
Any Double Digit Underdog Wins
Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game
Highest Scoring Game of the Season (so far)*
96
89
83
78
74
73
72
72
69
59
59
55
55
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
45
45
45
41
41
41
41
37
37
31
31
29
29
19
7
5
OptionProbability
35% or higher Kick Return rate
At least one missed kicking extra point attempt
Any team scores 24+ points before halftime
Pick Six
Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out
Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT
Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game
At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose
Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game
Any team scores 40+ points
Overtime
Safety Scored
California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)
Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes
AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back
Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game
Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses
Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)
Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games
2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week
Will a championship belt change teams?*
A 4th and 11+ is converted*
At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards
Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)
For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?
4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped
Punt or Kick Return Touchdown
A player gets an Octopus
A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points
A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts
The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number
Fake Punt
MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)
Fat Guy Touchdown*
All Starting Rookie QBs lose
3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game
Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game
A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)
A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)
Shutout
Any Double Digit Underdog Wins
A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury
Any 400 yard passer
All Starting Rookie QBs win
For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name
A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)
Scorigami
Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game
Highest Scoring Game of the Season (so far)*
86
86
80
80
80
78
71
69
69
69
55
54
53
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
49
45
45
45
45
44
41
41
41
41
37
37
34
34
31
31
31
26
24
24
20
20
5
OptionProbability
35% or higher Kick Return rate
At least one missed kicking extra point attempt
Any team scores 24+ points before halftime
Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out
At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose
Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT
Pick Six
Overtime
California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)
A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts
Safety Scored
Fake Punt
Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes
Any Double Digit Underdog Wins
Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game
Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game
Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses
Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)
Any 400 yard passer
Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games
2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week
Will a championship belt change teams?*
A 4th and 11+ is converted*
At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards
Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)
For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?
4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped
AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back
A player gets an Octopus
A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points
All Starting Rookie QBs lose
The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number
Punt or Kick Return Touchdown
MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)
Fat Guy Touchdown*
3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game
Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game
A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)
A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury
A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)
Any team scores 40+ points
For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name
A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)
All Starting Rookie QBs win
Scorigami
Shutout
Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game
Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game
Highest Scoring Game of the Season (so far)*
90
80
74
74
72
72
69
59
55
55
54
51
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
50
45
45
45
45
45
44
41
41
41
37
37
34
34
31
24
24
22
20
20
17
14
5
OptionVotes
YES
NO
2902
345
OptionProbability
2
1
3
4
48
28
18
6
OptionProbability
Glass of Thrones letdown (polished)
Watching Harry Potter 1 on airplane and rewinding and quoting over and over the meme wizard chess section
Quick dialog sketch: "Oh my gosh a black cat, we're going to have so much bad luck now" "Wait you don't really believe in that kind of stuff do you?" "See look we're already fighting :("
Friend who took a long time in the bathroom
Coaching my girlfriend to queue up match highlights from another room to avoid spoilers
Spies when they accidentally bite the poison pill hidden in their tooth
Sketchy human ATM
Depression after a team I never heard of loses
Before Sunrise POV in record shop
Whatever the next clip of me doing standup is
Nervously removing a bunch of 'remove before flight' aviation tags from the counter of a helicopter tour company
Glass of Thrones letdown
Remembering that PBR was a thing
Gross side of owls delivering mail in the great hall
A compilation of OpenAI employees interrupting ChatGPT (and potentially gradually fading to a scene from terminator)
Demo of the new ChatGPT but it's way too flirty
Candy addiction hotline
Having a bone to pick with soccer players doing a “bow and arrow” celebration but letting go of the bow
Friend who thinks they're safety officer
Brainstorming how to become viral
Slytherin doing the math
Cheap Airbnb tour
American Express review
Future Me
How it feels logging in with authenticator (shot in the style of dramatically diffusing a bomb)
NFC Translation
Satire of sales ads
Saying "Damn" in front of a dam.
Every time I try to order a beer
Dreamy nonsensical philosophy shot
Thinking I'm admiring the view from the Tokyo Skytower only to reveal that I don't realize I'm actually at the base of it.
100
100
100
76
75
71
69
68
66
66
62
59
59
59
58
58
56
55
54
53
53
51
50
50
50
48
46
45
41
37
0
OptionProbability
9
8 or less
10
11 or more
42
25
22
11
OptionVotes
YES
NO
101
99