Sheets News

Lionel Messi to score at least one goal

Total goals in the tournament to exceed 200

The Golden Boot winner to score 6+ goals

VAR to overturn at least 20 decisions

Someone scores 5+ goals within group stage

USA survives group stage

Total goals in the tournament to exceed 300

10+ goals in any match

2+ red cards in any match

2+ European countries reach top 4

Any player scores at least a goal 3 matches in a row

The Golden Boot winner to score 8+ goals

Goal from last kick of the game

Cristiano Ronaldo to score a goal

3+ penalty shootout

Mexico survives group stage

Canada survives group stage

The Golden Ball is awarded to a player from tournament winner

South American team reaches semi-final

3+ red cards in any match

6+ yellow cards in any match

Red card issued for mouth covering

Team with 0 wins in Group Stage

Black player gets the red card

Player throws captains armband

Bicycle kick attempt

Team scores after being down to 10 men

Both teams score in stoppage time

Player scores against country of birth/heritage

Player bleeding on camera during match

Team loses possession from delay throw-in

15+ minutes of the stoppage time

Champion is unbeaten

USA player gets the red card

Disruption at Iran match

A fully southern hemisphere team (Australia, NZ, South Africa, Uruguay or Argentina) makes semi finals.

Hooligans light the fireworks at night by team hotel for disruption

Player scores a hat-trick

Over 6.5 matches ending 0-0 (regular time only)

Over 289.5 total goals scored*

Over 9.5 own goals scored

Over 10.5 red cards

Spain goes further than France

Over 7.5 goals scored in a single group stage match

Over 202.5 goals scored in group stage

US scores in every single group stage match

Scorigami (a match ends in a score that has never happened at a World Cup; for the purpose of this answer refers only to result before extra time / shootout)

Play suspended for more than 1.5 hours in a single match

Bottle thrown on field

Teenager scores a goal (non penalty shoot-out)

Messi is top Argentinian goal-scorer

Team finishes match with 9 players

25+ people arrested at stadium

French-born player scores against France

Team makes it to Round of 32 with no goals conceded

3 or more coaches resign or are fired before end of World Cup

Single top goalscorer in tournament (not tied)

Goal scored directly from a free-kick

A coach is sacked before the end of the tournament

Team is undefeated for the entire tournament (only wins & draws)

Champion is a first place group stage winner

First penalty shootout kick of tournament is missed/saved

Team ends Group Stage with a clean sheet

Player not born in the country they are playing for scores 2+ goals

Trump still alive at end of final match

“Puto” chant at match

Crowd jump registers on local seismic sensor

Referee falls down

Match has a dedicated moment of silence

Any host places 1st in their group

Curaçao scores a goal

Haaland scores over 3.5 goals

Messi scores a goal at 39 years old

Both players in this photo* play each other in a match

Fan hospitalized for heat related illness

Kylian Mbappe & Harry Kane to Score 9+ Goals Combined

Trump attends match

Neymar plays in a match

Player dies during World Cup

Vuvuzela spotted in the stadium stands

An over-enthusiastic goal celebration results in a shattered corner flag

A penalty shootout contains a missed winning kick (Matchball)

At least two Mohammeds (all variants) score ≥1 goal

Player tears their ACL

Players cleat falls off their foot

Unauthorized person gets on the pitch during match

gruesome leg/ankle/arm injury

Another match day ending in all draws (regular time)

Will either Bosnia and Herzegovina or Qatar advance to the next round?

Will Cristiano Ronaldo Score Atleast A Goal In Next Match Against Uzbekistan

Will any group finish with either all draws or zero draws?

Will both brothers of any pair score at this World Cup?

Foam spray is used on field to mark penalty / free kick

Cape Verde scores a goal

Will any more team(s) from Europe finish 4th in the group?

Messi to score a free kick

Ronaldo to cry at the world cup

Team loses after leading 2-0

Golden Boot Winner wears Nike branded cleats

World Cup winner to never trail in a match

Penalty shootout goes 6+ rounds

Pride flag at Egypt v Iran match

Austria Pays Its Debt to Algeria? (Austria loses or draws with Algeria AND both teams qualify. Inspired by the 1982 “Disgrace of Gijón”)

Vorzinha concedes a goal by Argentina player in regular play

First team to lead goes through in 24+ knockout matches? (penalties count)

This World Cup Market reaches 500 traders

Gianni Infantino travels more than 50K miles during the tournament by airplane

Short Fuse: The Netherlands - Morocco ends in penalties

Any match is 0-0 going into penalty shootouts

Panenka penalty to be scored

Player scores 8+ goals

Player gets a straight red card in Round of 16

A team scores 4 goals in a knockout round game

A team loses after scoring 3 unanswered goals

Spain scores 3 or more goals against Austria [Short Fuse]

An even number of games go to a shootout

Any team scores 4 unanswered goals in a knockout stage match

Flash Market: No goals in 2nd half stoppage time today (July 3 - last three Rd of 32 games)

More goals scored in 3rd Place Match than in the Final (excluding penalty shootouts)

England v Mexico Match on July 5 rescheduled to a different time? (Currently scheduled 6pm local time)

Mexicans mess with England team before match in the any way (fireworks, beeping, delays)

Paraguay is playing undeniably the Haramball tonight

German Freddy back on the twitter (formerly known as the x) before end of final

In quarterfinals, the alphabetically earlier country wins more games

team that wins bronze has more goals across tournament than both gold and silver

Infantino and Trump sitting next to each other at any match

Player scores 2+ goals in a match (QF)

Player gets 2 yellow cards in a match (QF)

Mbappe scores a non-penalty kick goal (QF)

A shot with xG greater than 0.75 gets missed (QF)

USA strikes Iran anytime from start of quarterfianals to ending of them

Trump flies in the Qatari Air Force One to final

Paraguayan Senator Celeste Amarilla goes on another rant about Mbappe before end of final

France, Spain, England & Argentina all go to Half Finales

Mikel Merino finishes the World Cup with more or the same number of goals as Lamine Yamal

A French player leaves the field injured against Spain (like Mendes and Courtois)

Goal scored in stoppage time (SF)

Over 3.5 goals scored (SF)

Goal scored from a header (SF)

Goal is disallowed for offside (SF)

Team wins by exactly 1 goal (SF)

Mitch McConnell alive for entire final match?

match

Over 4.5 goals in semi finals

Substitute scores in semi finals

Spain ball posession under 55.5% in semi final

Ball hits the woodwork in semi final match

English fans acting unruly before, during or after Argentina match

Both England and Argentina score a goal in the semifinal

Both Teams to Score Argentina/ England in 90minutes plus stoppage time. (Not Extra time)

Match ends in a draw in regular time (F)

Final combined match score is an odd number (F)

Goal is disallowed for offside (F)

Team wins by exactly 1 goal (F)

Match is won in extra-time (F)

Goalkeeper ends match with a clean sheet (F)

Substitute scores a goal (F)

Match ends 0-0 in regular time (F)

Spain first to score (F)

Match is tied at halftime (F)

First yellow card given to Argentina (F)

Player gets 2 yellow cards in a match (F)

Trump touches in any way the Messi at final match/stadium

Argentinian player leaves injured in the final (like Mendes, Courtois and Saliba)

Score 0-0 in first part of extra time

Spain wins

Argentina lose Spain

World Cup team coach resigns or is fired before end of July (after final)

Asian player gets the red card

FIFA’s official total revenue for the 2023-2026 cycle exceed $16.billion

The ballon d’or is awarded to a player from World Cup winner

Asian player misses penalty kick

USA to reach the Quarter-finals or further

A penalty shootout to decide the Final match

No red cards issued in the Final match

Erling Haaland to win the Golden Boot

An African nation to reach the Semi-finals

5+ group stage winners advance with 9 points (3 wins)

15+ cards in any match

Total goals in the tournament to exceed 400

Any one of Harry Kane, Kylian Mbappe, or Erling Haaland to score a hattrick

Goal scored within 1st minute

Penalty shootout to decide semi-final match

Penalty shootout to decide a quarter-final match

20+ penalty goals

30+ penalty goals

Messi and Ronaldo play in the same match

Asia team reaches semi final

The Golden Boot winner is decided by # assists

Goalkeeper attempts shot in PKs

Player arrested / detained at any time of tournament

Trump kicks or holds a soccer ball at any time during tournament

Weather postponement or delay for greater than 3 hours

Player bit during match

Bald person gets the red card

Football is coming home?

Match delayed due to homophobic crowd chant

Coach on camera during match smelling finger(s)

Headbutt during match

Laser pointer on goalie during match

Someone escorted off field shirtless

Player gets spat on during match

Ronaldo gets in referee face

England loses on penalties

More own goals than red cards in tourney

VAR overturns second yellow card

Player walks off pitch protesting referee

Player shits in the pants during match

The Netherlands does not survive group stage

Confirmed case of Ebola at the match

Player is complaining about the Trionda ball / blames it for the losing

Trump attends 3 or more games

All 3 host countries win the opener

ICE makes a capture at the stadium

Player with the heat stroke / heat related illness

Smoke bomb during match in USA

Flares in stands during match in USA

Taylor Swift & Travis Kelce attend match

Elon Musk attends match

Betting scandal reported

Player wearing a face mask in semi-final match

All 48 teams score at least 1 goal

Fastest goal record beaten (11 seconds)

Over 8.5 penalties missed (excludes shoot-outs)

Over 30.5 penalties scored (excludes shoot-outs)

Over 395.5 yellow cards

Any host nation in quarter final

US goes further than Mexico

Canada goes further than US

Over 1.5 of the visible penis in world cup tourney (during match, on pitch)

Goal scored from own half

Olimpico goal (goal scored directly from corner kick, counts if corner taker is credited as the goalscorer by FIFA)

Goalkeeper scores a non-penalty goal

Game is turned around in stoppage team (one team leads at 90:00, the other team scores twice or more in stoppage time to win it)

A player or their teams gets sanctioned by FIFA (i. e. a fine, an overturned result, a suspension) for a goal celebration with a political or politics-adjacent message

Voodoo doll or alive chicken in stands

Team captain gets red card

Ronaldo scores before Messi

Pulisic top Team USA goal scorer

All teams concede at least 1 goal in group stage

Team gets removed or disqualified

Team makes it to Round of 16 with zero yellow cards

2 UEFA teams in final

Final is a rematch of a previous World Cup

Any match is canceled or postponed

Golden boot & golden ball won by the same player

Team wins a match without making a single substitution

Coaches of both teams in final match are wearing suits

Both teams in final have red on their flag

Team finishes third in group and makes it to final

Youngest player of the tournament scores a goal

Final features a team that has never made it to the final before

Visible debris thrown during corner kick attempt

Oldest player in tournament gets a yellow card

Team gets to final on all penalty shoot-outs in knockout rounds

Any player injured in opening group match & out for rest of tournament

Last penalty shoot-out kick of tournament is missed/saved

Palestinian or Israeli flag on field during match

Player wearing oxygen mask on sideline

Fans invade field during match

Major security incident

Animal (not birdy) is on field during match

Team USA fans pull off a decent Tifo

Shooting incident (non-ball) at stadium

Match is forfeited

Bonnie Blue attending a match

4+ Corners in Every Group Stage Match

Player drinking Liquid Death at hydration break

Salt Bae attending a match

King Charles attends match

Record for hottest WC match ever played broken (>101°)

Player blames an injury on poor stadium grass

Ayatollah Mojtaba Khamenei attending a match

Unofficial drone is reported flying over a stadium

Players from any other league outscore PL players in the tournament

USA plays Iran

Mohamed Salah (Egypt) scores 5+ goals during Group Stage Fixtures (Round of 64)

Ronaldo does jerkin move

Trump dancing at match

Team reaches the quarter-finals through draws and penalties

A group-stage match is decided by a freak "Olympico" goal scored directly from a corner

The fastest goal of the tournament is scored within 30 seconds

6+ teams with negative goal difference advance from the group stage

Player suffers cardiac arrest

Winning team has a foreign manager

Omar Artan is at a World Cup match

Another match with 3+ red cards

Players / members of team attempt to defect

A third-placed team is eliminated with 4+ points

Any team with <3 points advances from the group stage

Freddy attends the final match

Freddy shown during a match broadcast

Someone from Trump administration celebrating in locker room

Will any player be seen drinking gatorade during a hydration break?

Messi gets a yellow card

Ronaldo puts up the goose egg (excludes any penalty or shootout)

Trump acts innapropriate with trophy at final

German Freddy is uncovered to be the marketing stunt

Messi scores on every game he plays

Will Merlin the duck correctly predict both remaining MEX group stage matches?

Haaland scores on every game he plays

Match delayed due to anti-Trump crowd chant

Champion is a first time World Cup winner

Ronaldo does not start

Knockout Stage (incl 3rd/4th) to match or exceed Group-Stage scoring average

Play suspended for more than 2.5 hours in a single match

Team particpates in 3+ penalty shoot-outs

Any two brothers play against each other (Both must be on the pitch at the same time)

World Champion's goals > total goals of all teams out in group stage

Flipping Coinflips – Do teams shooting first win more penalty shootouts?

5+ hat tricks

Messi scores more goals than Mbappe

Penalty shootout goes 7+ rounds

Any country ranked outside FIFA Top 10 to reach semifinals (as of 6/11)

Over 14.5 own goals scored

Golden Glove Winner wears Senda, Rinat, RG, Voit or Adidas brand glove

Total goals in the tournament to exceed 310

Emmanuel Macron attends match

The Netherlands reaches half-final

16+ knockout matches to be won by 2+ goals inc. Extra Time (no Penalties)

17+ knockout matches to be won by 2+ goals - Regular time only!

France becomes finalist

France, Mexico, and Argentina all make it to the quarter finals

Belgium plays against The Netherlands

Of 5 competing continents, Europe has highest survival % in round of 32

16+ Knockout Stage Clean Sheets (0–0 after ET counts as 2)

Short Fuse: Germany scores 3 or more goals against Paraguay

FIFA officially apologizes or announces a general review of the VAR system following Germany’s disallowed goal vs Paraguay

Messi scores a goal in every match Argentina plays in

Overall penalty conversion rate to be 66.67% or higher ( all penalties no matter when)

Norway becomes finalist

Panenka penalty to be bottled

Three straight games going to penalties

Messi scores a goal in penalty shootout

Any team gets to penalty shootout and doesn't score a goal

Player with 9 or more assists

Enock Kabwende shown during broadcast

Announcer says Doctor Congo during 7/1 match broadcast

Any Trump attending BIH v USA match

Lead (or tied lead) goal scorer is on the team that wins the World Cup

World Cup winner won at least 2 games by shootout

A host country reaches the semi-finals

Belgium becomes finalist

Croatia gets a red card against Portugal [Short Fuse]

In knockouts, more teams with red cards WIN their matches

Round of 16 Special: „My vision, my rules“ - Referee sticks to original (no) Penalty, Goal or Red Card decision after On-Field Review

🇦🇷 ARG vs CPV 🇨🇻 – ARG wins both halves and scores more than three times as many goals as CPV

Own goal is scored (Rof16)

Over 1.5 matches end with a penalty shoot-out (Rof16)

Ronaldo scores a non-penalty kick goal (Rof16)

Team wins by exactly two goals (Rof16)

Mbappe doing the dictator point

Red card in CAN v MAR?

In round of 16, the alphabetically earlier country wins more games

3 continents reach semifinals

France's appeal successfully overturns Michael Olise's yellow card before the quarter-finals kickoff

Player doing lip trill shown in slow motion during final match broadcast on FOX

Trump attending the USA Belgium match

Trump takes credit for USA win within 1 day

Trump mentioned during USA BEL Fox broadcast today

Pitch Invader during USA BEL match today

Frances' tournament ends before Graham Platner drops out of Maine Senate race

"Is the TV broken?": There will be 4 or more On-Field Reviews (OFR) from the Quarterfinals onwards

"Shocking decision, Ref!": Any goal disallowed by VAR in the Quarterfinals AND any goal disallowed by VAR in the Semifinals (according to ESPN)

There will be a single leader in the Golden Boot ranking after the Quarterfinals (no tiebreak applies)

Norway player displays the flu like symptoms during match

Match ends 0-0 in regular time (QF)

Own goal is scored (QF)

Ball “heartbeat” graphic shown during FOX/FS1 broadcast (QF)

Over 1.5 matches end with a penalty shoot-out (QF)

Announcer says "Tom Brady" during France v Morocco

Player gets straight red card (QF)

Trump picks team he is supporting to win for the final game

Sam Altman attends final

JD Vance attends final

Morrocans stealing the towels or water bottles during game

Any Morrocan gets the red card

Morocco player picks up a ball during France possession 3+ times

France player picks up a ball during Morocco possession 3+ times

Shirtless player on field during match (QF)

Messi misses another penalty shot - includes shootout (QF-F)

Messi subbed out before the end of a match he played in (QF-F)

[France + Argentina] score more goals than [Spain + England] (SF)

Player scores 2+ goals in a match (SF)

Over 0.5 matches end with a penalty shoot-out (SF)

Match ends 0-0 in regular time (SF)

All teams score 1+ goals (SF)

Mbappe scores a non-penalty kick goal (SF)

Goal scored within the first 15 minutes (SF)

Own goal is scored (SF)

Player gets a straight red card (SF)

A shot with xG greater than 0.75 gets missed (SF)

Ball “heartbeat” graphic shown during FOX/FS1 broadcast (SF)

Shirtless player on field during match (SF)

Match is won in extra-time (SF)

Yellow card given for simulation (SF)

Harry Kane scores a non-penalty kick goal (SF)

Bellingham gets yellow card (SF)

Both players in this photo* score and/or assist (SF)

Strait of Hormuz open at start of final match?

Over 17.5 corners in semi finals

Mbappe & Oyarzabal to record 2+ shots on target in semi final

Gavi shown card in semi final

Otamendi shown card in semi final

Anything occurring to make it historical final

The market creator deems the result of the final to have been swayed by bias from the referee

Two different players with the same jersey number score in the final

Mbappé leads Golden Boot race after 3rd place match & Messi overtakes in Final to win the Award

Mbappé less than 60 mins on the pitch in Consolation Final 3./4.

Sore Losers: Any player or official from the losing team to instantly remove or reject their silver medal after the Final

Own goal is scored (F)

Intruder on field during match (F)

Goal scored in stoppage time (F)

Over 2.5 goals scored (F)

Player scores 2+ goals in a match (F)

Penalty kick missed during regular/extra time (F)

Goal scored from a header (F)

A shot with xG greater than 0.75 gets missed (F)

Player gets a straight red card (F)

Penalty kick is given in 2nd half (F)

Argentina last to score (F)

[France + Argentina] score more goals than [Spain + England] (F)

Goal scored within the last 15 minutes (F)

Match ends 1-1 in regular time (F)

Final score is 1-2 or 2-1 (F)

Match ends with penalty shoot-out (F)

Winning team has lower total ball possession (F)

Both teams score 1+ goals in 2nd half (F)

Goal is scored from outside the penalty box (F)

Over 1.5 goals scored (F)

All teams score 1+ goals (F)

First yellow card in 2nd half given to Spain (F)

Goal scored in first 15 minutes of 2nd half (F)

Argentina first to score in 2nd half (F)

No yellow cards given in 1st half (F)

Goal scored within the first 15 minutes (F)

Yellow card given for simulation (F)

Ball “heartbeat” graphic shown during FOX/FS1 broadcast (F)

Both players in this photo* score and/or assist (F)

Argentina gets a penalty in regular time in the finals

Banner referencing historical territorial dispute visible during final or 3rd place match

"Albiceleste Cardiac Arrest": Argentina scores the game's final goal from 75' onward to win or force extra time (F)

"Pessi's Redemption": Messi scores a penalty and wins the Golden Boot

Javier Milei tweets VLLC or "Viva la libertad carajo" before the winning captain lifts the trophy (F)

The final score in the final is an internet certified funny number e.g. 2-1, 6-7, 6-9, 4-20 (ascending and descending order allowed)

Score 0-0 in second part of extra time

NO

Stretch-and-fold after mixing, 3x every 30 min

3 iterations of stretch-and-fold, at any time during the 14h waiting period. Minimum wait time between iterations 1 hour

Place small ice cubes between parchment and pot instead of water

Add 1tsp of diastatic malt powder per 3cps of flour

Use tap water instead of fancy RO water

put butter into it

Toast the bread

Put a non-lethal dose of any rat poison.

Donate the bread to a food pantry, homeless person, or someone else in need

Add lots of butter (0.2 ml per gram)

Half yeast

Bake it with your best friend.

Use whole wheat to improve the nutrition of the bread

Bake for 5 more minutes

Bake for an amount of minutes equal to the percent this market answer is at when it comes time to begin baking. (Maintain the ±3 minute tolerances and the 2:1 ratio of time before:after the water spritz.)

Sprinkle 3 grams of flaky sea salt on top of each loaf before the second bake

Increase water by 50 g

it needs more salt

Replace all water spritz steps with a basting of extra virgin olive oil.

Diastatic malt (~1% baker's percentage) = happier yeast

Serve the bread hot

Use Iodized salt

Do a second rise

Don't eat anything for at least 48 hours before eating the bread

Create indentation, fill with melted cheese and butter

Use sourdough instead of yeast

Sprinkle sesame seeds evenly over the top

don't eat anything for at least 2400 hours before eating the bread

Add garlic

Cut into the dough right before baking looks destructive to improve the appearance

Sell your bread at an auction and donate the money to those in immigration detention prisons.

Do it with a good spirit in your heart, or ask someone with a good spirit to do it for you. But don’t watch while they do it.

Give ChatGPT your current recipe as well your take on what optimal bread tastes like, then take that advice for your next bake

Just freeze the ready bread, then slowly bake it until it’s hot inside. It will give you a crustier crumb, contain less moisture, and taste better.

Strawberry jelly filling

Do all the changes in the top 5 open options by probability, excluding this option

Add an amount of non-smoked paprika equal to the current salt content

Short advice: Start baking at 260°C for strong rise, then reduce to 230°C and uncover halfway to achieve even browning and a crisp crust. 🍞

Don't automatically "Heat water to 30±1 °C". Instead, aim for a desired dough temperature (DDT) of 25-26°C. 30°C water is too hot for summer, and potentially too cool for winter.

Use the same dough bake it as focaccia. Flat with EVOO added during shaped rise and baste with EVOO instead of spraying water during baking.

put ketchup and cheese on it

Add slurs to it

Make all of the ingredients from scratch.

Ask ChatGPT (GPT-5, with thinking enabled) for suggestions on improving the bread, with this market description, then do all of them.

Get recipe from gemini with experiments done, taste preference, then confirm it with chatgpt for final suggestion.

Don't eat anything for at least 24 hours before eating the bread

Try baking a little more "bien cuit". If the image is indicative, your loaves may be quite "blonde".

Substitute 75 g of your flour with spelt flour

Make the bread taste good

Put a baking rack in the Dutch oven before putting the loaf in, raising the loaf off the floor and lofting it over a layer of air.

Buy bread from a michelin star restaurant.

Invest in a "Bakers Steel" for better heat retention and oven spring. It would mean graduating from a dutch oven though.

If your city uses artesian water, replace plastic bottled water with tap water. It will add natural, healthy alkalinity to your bread.

throw your recipe into a black box Bayesian hyperparameter optimization framework and iterate as necessary (see the Google Vizier Cookie Recipe paper for example

Watch the video

Ditch current process, do everything the same as the video

Bread flour, 3x yeast, cut rise to ~3h

Use lemonade instead of water.

Eat the bread while punching @realDonaldTrump in the face

Eat the bread while watching your mana balance steadily tick to (M)0

Throw the bread at a telescope

Cut bread into loaves before serving

Cut bread into ≤0.4inch slices, toast before serving

Invite your taste-testers to make the bread with you

Tarriff the bread-making process with a 10% reduction of all ingredients where actual physical money is required to purchase them, until it “shrinkflates,” but try to keep the same volume. Do not reduce any free ingredients.

Standardize a separate list of process features to keep track of independently of all other tests and use the cross entropy method to tune them to maximize your bread preference

Taste the bread

put oats on top of the dough just before baking, press them in so they don't fall off

Buy chemical bread improvers

Add 6.25±1.25 g lemon juice when mixing in water to yeast and salt jug

add 'gunpowder' (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Idli_podi)

Make banana bread

Add 1/2 scoop whey protein powder

Replace part of the flour in the dough with freshly crushed hemp seeds. It will make the bread a little bit sweeter, especially appealing for Canadians.

Add cheese inside it and also sausage

Add melatonin to the bread and eat before you sleep (do safely)

Eat it slowly and focus on the taste

While the bread is baking, tip every user who voted "Yes" on this option 25 Mana

Use a food-grade, human-approved vitamin D supplement in the correct dosage for testers with vitamin D deficiency

Use a convection oven/setting

Keep the bread in a high quality expensive beeswax coated textile bag

Complete 5 items from your to-do list while the bread is rising

Make the bread great again

Mix only flour and water. Wait 30–60 minutes. Then mix in yeast and salt.

Add caffeine to the bread

Use soda instead of water (clear, orange, yellow, etc. soda is ok. Don’t use a purple/brown soda as that would make it not look good)

Butter resolved yes twice. Double butter again.

Decompose it into infinite spheres, then a few parts per sphere, rotate the spheres by arccos(1/3), unite them and you will find 2 chilis (Banach-Tarski)

Give Gemini your current recipe as well your take on what optimal bread tastes like, then take that advice for your next bake

Bake the Manifold Crane into the Bread

Make the bread edible then throw it in

Drink vodka while eating the bread

Bake the bread into a fun shape, like a fish, or an octagon

Do FOLDED

Quit Manifold into the bread.

Kill the bread into Manifold.

Assume the chili is not in the interval [0,1], square it for more chili, if it is in (0,1), take the square root, else (equals 0 or 1) add 1 to it.

Assume the chili is in the interval (0,1), square it for less chili, if it is in (1,infinity) take the square root, if it is in (-infinity,0) take the negative of the square of the of the chile, else (equals 0 or 1) subtract 1 from it.

Add 2 tbsp vanilla cake mix

Replace AP with bread flour and cruelly mix the dough in the mixer until elastic and not sticky

Add a tablespoon of sugar

Bake one more minute

Follow a recipe online

Grind/powderize all salt used into a fine powder (with pestle & mortar or similar device)

Instead of RO water, use lightly rusty water to improve the nutritional value of the bread with soluble iron.

Add at least 20% chic pea flour or some other type of high protein flour

Knead it only 10 times, keep it round like this number

Ask yourself if bread is healthier than fruits? No need to improve my bread

Bake for 15 more minutes

Resolve at least one thing here yes or no while baking bread

A system view is more appropriate. This is a dynamic, multi-variate, biological and chemical system. For e.g. conditioning salt % AND yeast % AND water temperature based on ingredient and ambient temps.

Wear a suit while baking the cake.

Encourage people to participate in the market in good faith while making the bread

Replace salt with sugar

replace 10% of flour with farina bona

Have someone sell the bread to you at an expensive price

Only buy ingredients from 7/11.

Cook the bread with a rod/puck of aluminum foil (or similar) in the core in an attempt to conduct heat through the center of the bread, cooking it evenly like a doughnut.

Get your friends to help you make a batch ten times the size, but add a Pepper X (2.7M Scoville heat units) to the mixture

Replace 10% of flour with milled wheat bran

Slowly add sawdust to the bread until your friends start to notice.

Replace all water spritz steps with a basting of gravy that includes chicken stock

Mail the bread to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Washington D.C.

Replace 600+/-5g water with 600+/-50g water (eyeball rather than carefully measure)

Pray to your preferred agricultural/food deity before baking and before eating

Soak the finished product in vinegar for 24 hours

Ship a piece of the bread to a random person.

Frost it and put sprinkles on it to make it a birthday cake.

Add as many Jack Daniel's whiskey barrel smoking chips as feasible to the Dutch oven before baking, physically separating them from the bread as necessary while baking.

Give the bread a name in a ritual ceremony and baptise it, with pre-blessed holy water if a priest isn't available

Improve the bread

Quadruple salt

Combine all answers that are unresolved at the time you try this one

Bake your social security number into it.

Bake one fewer minute

Bake the cake while wearing a onesie.

Test/filter the water for heavy metals

Eat the bread in front of the White House.

Implement all options that resolved NO

Make the bread inedible then throw it out.

Throw the bread at @realDonaldTrump

Force Feed it to @realDonaldTrump

Cut the bread into the number of traders in the market slices.

make the bread bounce

Implementing every element listed below.

Just make donuts instead

Bake it in an easy bake kids oven

Use a plastic baking sheet.

Eat the bread while betting yes on Cuomo on Manifold

Double oven temperature

Bake the bread very thin and add food coloring to make it have the US flag. Don’t allow it to touch the ground, illuminate at night, fold 13 times properly, and pledge allegiance before eating.

Don’t use usual water (room temperature) for the dough - that water’s only for toilets. Use electrolyte drinks instead with ice cubes; they make the dough taste better and add extra nutrition.

Light it on fire with birthday candles.

Bake it with a microwave

Halve oven temperature

Eat the bread while betting yes on Mamdani on Manifold

Step on it

Bring it to Yemen and put a bomb in it

Bake America Great Again

Sacrifice a lamb

Add MAGA and a splash of Trump juice

Bake in a cat and a dog

Explode it:

5 parts cyanide/ 1 part water/ 1 part sand

say 6 7 67 times before making the bread

Take a fat dump in the dough

Sit in dough 24 hrs

Replace flour with flowers

Let dough sit 24 hrs

Mix half sodium/potassium chloride

Add 2g? of baking soda

Bake in rectangular tin

Add 50g vital wheat gluten

double yeast

halve salt

Double salt

Add 2tsp olive oil

Refrigerate dough instead of room temp wait

Start at 500F, drop to 450F and uncover half way through

Do not mix salt and yeast in water together

Autolyse 20 minutes

Let dough rise on counter only until double volume or 2h max, any time longer in fridge

Think positive thoughts before tasting

Put fork in microwave

Don't eat anything for at least 12 hours before eating the bread

Add 2tbsp vanilla extract

Play classical music while baking

Make naan bread, an easy-to-make bread

Add a pinch of sugar

Bake on upside-down sheet pan, covered with Dutch oven

Eat the bread with friends

Bake vegimite into it.

Bake vodka into it

Bake it in the country you were born in.

Let dough sit 48 hrs

Resolve this option YES while eating the bread

Ditch all the steps. Just buy the bread from the supermarket

Eat the bread over the course of a week.

Bake for 5 fewer minutes

Use 50% whole grain flour

Bake the bread with love

Use King Arthur Bread Flour instead of All-Purpose

Add sawdust to increase the volume of the bread (but only like 10% sawdust by volume max. maybe 20% if it's good sawdust)

More steam! Either spritz with more water (preferably hot) or actually pour some boiling water in just before closing the lid.

Resolve this option NO while eating the bread

Incorporate a whole grain flour (buckwheat for example)

Add 50g sugar

Add 50g honey

Swap 200ml water for milk

Cover bread with damp paper towel instead of initial water spritz. Rehydrate paper towel during 2nd spritz. Remove paper towel before placing on cooling rack.

Make a poolish 12 h ahead: 100 g flour + 100 g water + 0.8 g yeast (0.1 %). After it ferments, use this poolish in place of 100 g flour and 100 g water in the final dough.

Add an amount of MSG equivalent to half the current salt content

Use flour made from an unconventional grain e.g. barley, millet, oats, rye, sorghum, maize etc.

Eat the bread while sending all your mana to @realDonaldTrump

Add 1/2 cup yogurt to the bread and name the bread “gurt” while addressing it with “yo, gurt”.

Add banana

Add poppy seeds

Replace some of the water with an egg (eg. remove 25g of water for a 50g egg)

Only use tap water from specifically New York City

Want to improve the value of your bread? Simply bake a piece of gold into it

NO

YES

YES

YES

NO

YES

NO

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