Summer is ON News

call someone retarded through text or speech

Take control of the army National Guard of a state (not just announcement)

A literal red line on the ground/floor

complete 50% of project 2025 as reported by project2025.observer

Initiates low intensity conflict with Venezuela

Weaponize Federal Procurement: Launch a DOJ criminal investigation into Fed Chair Powell’s $2.5B renovation probity, while simultaneously accepting $400M in private corporate donations for the White House 'State Ballroom'.

refuse to accept results of 2026 midterms in at least one state

repeal or reform the dietary guidelines

request and successfully redraw 1 or more state districts

Stays alive

explicitly conditions FEMA aid to a blue state on unrelated ideological issue

complete 66% of project 2025 as reported by project2025.observer

request and successfully redraw 2 or more state districts

intervenes to stop a federal criminal investigation into a high ranking republican

Pardons an officer for a crime committed on the job enforcing immigration laws

Military against drug cartells on venezuelas ground

Eliminate the two-person train crew safety regulations (DoT request from Project 2025)

new blockade of a country

request and successfully redraw 3 or more state districts

sends USA troops to enter Mexico without permission

put his name on a ship in the navy

have any governmental officials visit Taiwan formally or informally

order the arrest of a governor by name even if it does not happen

forcibly shuts down a windmill farm power plant or revokes permits etc

declare war and send troops to aggressively enter any new country

have a journalist arrested

Trump will pardon those involved before the sentencing - medical fraud schemes

Revoke ten or more citizenships

issue circulation coin or bill with his image or pass laws to do that in the near future

Causes Tina Peters' early release

have the DOJ "classify educators and public librarians" who discuss "transgender ideology" with minors as "sex offenders." as per project 2025

Call for the banning of HRT (hormone replacement therapy)

ten or more protestors killed during term

pass 500 or more executive orders

sells 100 square miles or more of federal property to private owners or other countries

Mandate teaching Arabic numerals in East (American) Samoan schools

closes 1 or more national parks (63 as of question creation)

get ukraine to agree to give up ALL of the donbas AND crimea to russia

File lawsuit against a congressperson

complete 75% of project 2025 as reported by project2025.observer

Uses the US military or National Guard to prevent at least one legal voter from casting a ballot during 2028 election

Nominate a family member to high office

Enforce the Comstock Act at least once

Dep

Appoint a crony, such as Bondi, or his personal lawyers, to SCOTUS

call for twitter / x to ban account of a democrat politician

Remove tax exempt status from one or more universities

Orders an agency under federal control to arrest a congressperson

Sunset the Office of Accountability and Whistleblower Protection (Veteran Affairs)

add a new federal holiday in his honor

Weaken regulations on baby formula as per project 2025

Bans / restricts guns for trans people (or tries to)

Raise the retirement age for social security

stops all sanctions on Russia

Raise contribution limits (FEC)

Lessen child labor regulations to allow "teenage workers" to work "inherently dangerous jobs". (DoL)

Order the arrest of a sitting member of congress

Actually privatizes at least part of the USPO

resume buying oil from Russia

revoke broadcasting licenses of a media company he does not like

force a former president to testify before Congress

Gets angry with Putin and renews (also indirect) nuclear threat.

Accept a gift of an airplane to *himself personally* (not a gift to the US government)

His name is on the ballot for the 2028 Republican primaries in any state/territory

Call for the death penalty of any former president by name

have FBI DOJ or other agency charge a congressperson with treason

Postpone the elections due to emergency

Closes or makes radical ideological changes to The National Museum of African American History and Culture

Enact price controls on groceries

Kidnap *another* head of state (after Maduro)

call someone a pedophile explicitely by name through text or speech

remove a major non NATO ally from the current list

Pardons a private citizen for an act in opposition to an anti-trump protest

repeal the Federal Sugar program (USDA) as suggested by project 2025

Add a citizenship question to the census

End congressional review of arms transfers to foreign countries (DoD)

host putin at mar a lago

Airstrikes or bombs Mexican territory (drone artillery etc count)

federalize a city or area currently under control of another state (not DC)

complete 90% of project 2025 as reported by project2025.observer

repeal the federal mandate to label genetically engineered food (as per project 2025)

Eliminate ACA's requirement to cover the morning after pill

Call for the default of the United States sovereign debt

Pardons someone acting as a private citizen for an act in support of immigration enforcement (not an on duty officer)

Prosecute someone for flag burning

classify "transgender ideology" as "domestic terrorism," as per The Daily Wire

department of defense renamed to Dept of war

Pardon himself

delete Juneteenth as a federal holiday

Deports at least one athlete during the 2026 FIFA World Cup

appoint a family member to lead any federal agency

declare he has officially undone a past presidential pardon

Impose time-limits on how long low-income people can receive Medicaid in their lifetime

force a census to happen when it normally wouldnt

Get rid of Noaa.

Have USA test a nuclear bomb anywhere

Says 6 7 (or variant)

enact special taxes or tariffs on a subset of states he does not like

Causes derek chauvin's early release

Deploy US troops into any of 83 Federal subjects of Russian Federation (or announce that)

Call for the end of the House of Reps

Deports at least one Olympic athlete during the 2028 Summer Olympics

Pass a federal "Parents' Bill of Rights" with regard to Education

take control of a part of greenland

Remove all federal funding for SNAP/food stamps

Gets influence on Gaza strip to make investment deals with real estate or buys land.

All 10 of the 10 largest protests in the USA happen under trump

Eliminate the DHS Office of Intelligence and Analysis

repeal Obamacare

pardon derek chauvin

admin stops reccomending fluorinated water entirely

Privatize the FEMA National Flood Insurance Program

federally mandate ten commandments or Bible in classrooms

debank a congressperson governor or mayor

expand the supreme Court and appoint someone new

Prohibit use of aborted fetal cells in research for new medical applications as per project 2025

Eliminate the U.S. Trade and Development Agency

Threatening to attack a US defence pact ally (e.g. NATO, Rio Pact etc.) with nuclear weapons

actually disinter bodies from another country

Call for the end of child marriage

Four or more protestors/bystanders killed by national guard/military in one day

Repeal of the Antiquities Act of 1906

Eliminate the Federal Reserve mission of full employment

Eliminate all administrative proceedings within the SEC

orders arrests of any Biden family member

Annex any part of Mexico

Pardon a convicted pedophile

cause Fox, nbc CNN MSNBC or another main news channel to shut down

announce that a part of Canada belongs to the USA

Remove all unions in the Dept. of Homeland Security

Prevent the VA from covering abortion services

Replace his Vice President

confiscate 1 million or more from the Democratic party itself

Eliminate the Office of Children’s Health Protection

Dissolve/shut down/abolish NASA

Calls himself a dictator or unambiguous synonym (without equivocating)

Salute Putin

Eliminate the Office of Enforcement and Compliance Assistance (EPA)

expand the borders of the usa

remove tax exempt from only certain religions

have a supreme court justice impeached and/or removed

threaten to disinter bodies from another country

Require all schools that receive federal funding to give students the military entrance test.

Mandate time-and-a-half compensation on a Sabbath (project 2025 request)

change it so that presidents can serve 3 or more terms again

fauci in jail at least one week

take control of a part of ukraine

confiscate 1 million or more from an individual Congress person

add a new state

pardon george santos

take state ownership in an airline

Attack a NATO ally.

Pardon p diddy

Repeal the Global Change Research Act of 1990

changes the logo or name of a previously offensive sport team (pressures until they actually do it)

ends black history month

Implement a federal age of consent

Eliminate the DOE Loan Program

Delist the grizzly bear AND gray wolf from the Endangered Species Act

Call for the assassination of the leader of an allied nation

Deports all the athletes of at least one nation during the 2026 FIFA World Cup

declares a white history month

Four or more protestors (or bystanders) killed by national guard

New restrictions on SSRIs (including a ban)

Sides with Putin because he has compromising information against Trump regarding the Epstein files.

Call for the end of gay marriage

Announce he’s running for a third term

Fully or partially privatize Social Security

ban trans people from holding federal offices

Implement a federal abortion ban

make statements that are negative about labubu

Call for the abolition of the voting rights act or the 15th amendment

breaks ground on a trump building in Gaza

fully nationalize an airline

Call for the end of the Senate

Wind down and privatize Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac

Does Nazi / Roman salute with same passion as Elon's gesture

stop California from hosting the Olympics

Deports all the athletes of at least one nation during the 2028 Summer Olympics

ban all new incoming students from china and/or india

Pardon ghislaine maxwell

change or add a face on Mount Rushmore

change the borders of a state

breaks ground on a trump building in Russia

Detonates a nuclear weapon as an act of war

repeal an amendment

Withdraw from NATO

give sell or otherwise transfer a part of Alaska to Russia

Abolish the Federal Reserve and move to a "free banking" system

enter a mutual defense partnership with russia or north korea

cancel the 2028 election / it doesnt happen for any reason

Call for the end of interracial marriage

After the ballroom he starts building a palace for the future Trump-Monarchy

bans anime

bans 6 7

all time high unemployment reached

Ban construction of new windmills in the USA for power generation

Wearing a white dress after labor day

Bond will be a man

Gunplay

Bond drives a car

On screen fatalities

London will appear on screen

Car chase scene

Urban scene

Bond wears a suit/tuxedo

Bond tells ≥1 joke

Bond introduces himself as "Bond, James Bond"

A vessel is shown on screen containing any of the following: ketchup, mustard, wasabi, soy sauce, hot sauce, beer, wine, whiskey, cologne, or sulfuric acid.

A named character speaks in a language other than English

Bond will attend a gala, soirée, ball, banquet, masquerade, black-tie event, cocktail party, fundraiser, awards ceremony, premiere, reception, or a charity auction.

Bond drinks a martini

Female and/or BIPOC director and/or producer

Opening action sequence

The Tower of London, Big Ben, Buckingham Palace, Wembley, or Heathrow appears on screen.

Gun Barrel Sequence

Sex scene

World capital other than London appears on screen

Hacking electronics of some form

Q appears

Runtime of at least 2 hours/120 minutes.

Bond solves ≥ 1 problem non-violently

Bond uses explosives

The plot will be predominantly set in present day

Bond disarms someone with a melee weapon using martial arts

The main theme song will be sung by a female

The film features a scene at a UNESCO World Heritage Site.

Fatal-if-missed aerial jump

A Bird (Avian) Will Appear Onscreen for >2 Seconds

Bond will shoot an inanimate object on purpose.

Asia will appear on screen

Someone goes through a pane of glass

A named character is a double (or triple, etc.) agent

It will gross more worldwide than No Time to Die ($774M)

The villain will use or work in the field of artificial intelligence.

"King" or "Queen" of England mentioned

Bond is on vacation (is shown somewhere for enjoyment, without purpose for his mission)

Someone in the movie says the title

@HenriThunberg enjoys the film

It will feature ≥1 actor that was part of No Time to Die

The villain is played by an actor who had a lead or recurring role on a prestigious television series that aired on either AMC or HBO.

South America, Africa, or Australia will appear on screen

The words "James Bond will return" appear on screen during or after the credits.

Bond rides a motorcycle

A single large explosion occurs on screen at the same time as Bond, and he doesn't look at it

>=85 on Tomatometer 1 month after US release

Critics will say it's a return to classic bond

A sniper rifle is fired

At least a portion filmed in Canada

Blue-eyed Bond

There will be a scene with wagering, gambling or betting

Bond wields a Walther PPK

Interracial sex scene

Pegasus, Phoenix, Griffin, Unicorn, Kraken, Minotaur, Medusa, Cyclops, Sphinx, Kitsune, Chimera, or Thunderbird (any visual representation)

Jungle / forest scene

M will be played by Ralph Fiennes

Bond flys an aircraft

James Bond disobeys orders from MI6 or the British government

Bond attends a soccer match, cricket game, rugby match, boxing/MMA fight, tennis match, e-sport event, the Olympics, a carnival or fair, the opera, or a horse race.

Casino game scene

>= 7.0 IMDB rating 1 year after release

Bond parachutes

It passes the Bechdel test (two named women talk the each other about anything besides a man)

Bond wears shorts

Bond pays for something by leaving money on a table and walking off without the recipient of the money present

>=7.5 on IMDB 1 month after US release

Arctic scene

Someone uses a euphemism to order a killing

Bond gets slapped

Prison/jail scene

A jet ski or snowmobile gets airborne

Black market trafficking

Someone climbs around on the outside of a building

Released in 2028

Skydiving

The main character will order a “Vodka Martini, shaken, not stirred” using that exact phrase.

Bond licks something

Bond and a pond shown on screen together

Main villain has a visible physical defect (scar, handicap, missing limb, ...)

someone combs or brushes their hair (or the hair of another person)

Bond in bondage (not necessarily sexual)

Bond slaps someone

A scene shows James Bond naked

Actor who plays Bond at least 6' (183 cm) tall

Death of a Bond love interest

James Bond talks to a woman while playing a card game.

A Gulf kingdom will appear on screen (e.g. Dubai)

Bond puts something phallic-shaped in his mouth

Bond is violent toward a woman (e.g. painful pulling, slap, throat grip...)

There will be a voiced character that is an AI

Bond rides a bicycle

Torture

Bond receives a gunshot wound

A visible countdown clock, which if it reaches zero something bad happens

Wilhelm scream

The title will refer to life and/or death

@brunoparga correctly guesses a pun beforehand

Bond plays craps, roulette, or blackjack

Bond drives a boat

A safe is cracked (any means possible)

Someone is shot with a tranquilizer dart or other nonlethal incapacitating projectile (getting wounded with a potentially lethal weapon doesn't count)

James Bond plays poker

Bond commits arson

Cryptocurrency is referenced

Oral sex

Bond smokes a cigarette/cigar

Tom Hardy, Cillian Murphy, or Zendaya appear on screen

Martini and a bikini shown on screen at the same time

Terrorists

US premier date is moved forward at least once (has to be numbered date, "summer 2026" doesn't count)

Someone carries a gun disassembled in a nondescript case

Someone speaks a verbal password phrase to verify their identity, gain access to a location, etc.

Actor who plays Bond is a US citizen

A pandemic or biological warfare will be a central plot

Desert scene

Nazis (neo- counts)

The ending pitches a next movie (continued story, introduction of villain, venegance, ...)

Ski chase scene

Drug use

Someone/something is x-rayed

Thunderstorm

Dessert scene

An actor who previous played a Bond villain appears (as either a new or recurring character)

President of the United States is mentioned

IF the main villain has a pet that plays a significant role in the plot, this pet is a horse...

Robots

Bond throws food, darts, or a Molotov cocktail

It refers to the transition between two British monarchs (Elizabeth, Charles and/or others)

Bond has facial hair

Bond will have a hot, young, American sidekick

Theme song will be performed by a band (more than one artist. Duran Duran did it, so there is precedent.)

There will be a promotional event in Fortnite

Bond wears a mask

Sharks

Cocaine or caviar appears on screen

James Bond plays baccarat

Scene with Bond wearing a hat and sunglasses

Bond complains about the quality of an alcoholic beverage

Bond plays golf, tennis, or croquet

Bond will be in a submarine

Bond goes to space

Bond is LQBTQ+

Bond rides an animal

James games (Bond plays any video game, table top board game, or role-playing game) *chess counts, casino games don't

Rolex, Aston Martin, Bollinger Champaign product placements (all three)

Main villain speaks Russian on screen

Bond has a disability

Bond claims to have retired / quit from the world of espionage

Mexico is shown on screen

Moscow, Kyiv, or Paris shown on screen

Jetpack

The movie will be set during the Cold War (1947-1991)

A previous Bond actor appears (as either a new or recurring character)

Trans character - explicity stated they are trans, no ambiguity (must be on screen for min. 7 seconds and say at least 3 words)

An EMP device plays a central role.

Climate change/global warming is explicitly mentioned

At least one named character below 18 years old

Canada is shown on screen

Orgy

Will feature something that can turn invisible

Someone asks for payment in "small, unmarked bills" or "negotiable bearer bonds" (wording need not be exact)

Underwater combat

The word "fuck" is said more than once.

With all this speculation about which kinds of sex acts will be shown, I'm surprised nobody has said it yet, so I'll say it: 𝕓𝕠𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕘𝕖

Bond beds a "lady of the night" (ie. He fucks a prostitute)

The main villain has a pet that plays a significant role in the plot.

Bond is blond

Features a shot with someone lowering a newspaper, magazine or book, revealing they had been surreptitiously spying on someone

Someone sees something incredible, and implicitly ascribes it to alcohol (traditionally, by looking at the bottle)

A pinball machine will appear.

Pirates

Theme song is performed by Taylor Swift

Assplay

Bond plays Russian roulette

Emilia Clarke portrays a character

Bond won't be Caucasian

A hamburger appears on screen

Bond uses a VR headset

Bond has a neck tattoo

Aaron Taylor-Johnson plays Bond

Nuclear explosion

Someone uses the word "clip" to refer to a magazine

Satanism

Revealed that "James Bond" has always been a code name.

fight featuring at least one of: viper, mongoose, someone with one of those as their code name

It will be described as featuring AI, such as claims that is uses “AI actors”, as reported by entertainment media.

Gay sex scene

ChatGPT is referenced by any character

Party and play (PnP), also known as chemsex, scene

Bond has a mustache (no other facial hair)

A character has the codename "Fat Rascal"

Theme song is performed by The Weeknd

San Francisco is shown on screen

Pegging

Another character coincidentally has the first name "James" or surname "Bond" (or both)

Horse cock on screen (flaccid)

Bond consumes more than 1.5 loads of jizz

A clocks shows the time 4:20

Feature Nightcore music

Supernatural entities

Prediction markets, origami, or the word "manifold" appear in the movie.

There will be a character codenamed "Fat Rascal" and they will be played by an American

Bond uses chopsticks

Released in 2026

Desert dessert scene (e.g. eating an ice cream in the Sahara)

Any character says the word "anime"

Vampires

Bond vapes

The main character will order a “café mocha, double double” using that exact phrase.

Bond dies

The fourth wall is broken

Scat play

Bond does depraved sexual acts for money (e.g., bukakke, public gang bangs, period play, etc.)

Contains a joke or indirect reference to the "last night I Bond Burgered your sister" meme

Horse cock on screen (erect)

Bond will say the line about snakes on a plane, but only as a metaphor (with snakes representing penises and the plane being his ass).

The handkerchief code is a major plot element

James Bond will say, "I'm rational, rationalussy."

Bond is vegan

It will be directed by a woman

Bond plays League of Legends

Destiny appears on screen

Bond says, “Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!”

Dragons

Dinosaurs

It will be directed by Christopher Nolan

Stretch-and-fold after mixing, 3x every 30 min

3 iterations of stretch-and-fold, at any time during the 14h waiting period. Minimum wait time between iterations 1 hour

Place small ice cubes between parchment and pot instead of water

Add 1tsp of diastatic malt powder per 3cps of flour

Use tap water instead of fancy RO water

put butter into it

Toast the bread

Donate the bread to a food pantry, homeless person, or someone else in need

Add lots of butter (0.2 ml per gram)

Half yeast

Bake it with your best friend.

Use whole wheat to improve the nutrition of the bread

Bake for 5 more minutes

Bake for an amount of minutes equal to the percent this market answer is at when it comes time to begin baking. (Maintain the ±3 minute tolerances and the 2:1 ratio of time before:after the water spritz.)

Sprinkle 3 grams of flaky sea salt on top of each loaf before the second bake

Increase water by 50 g

it needs more salt

Replace all water spritz steps with a basting of extra virgin olive oil.

Diastatic malt (~1% baker's percentage) = happier yeast

Serve the bread hot

Do a second rise

Create indentation, fill with melted cheese and butter

Use sourdough instead of yeast

don't eat anything for at least 2400 hours before eating the bread

Cut into the dough right before baking looks destructive to improve the appearance

Sell your bread at an auction and donate the money to those in immigration detention prisons.

Do it with a good spirit in your heart, or ask someone with a good spirit to do it for you. But don’t watch while they do it.

Make banana bread

Sprinkle sesame seeds evenly over the top

Short advice: Start baking at 260°C for strong rise, then reduce to 230°C and uncover halfway to achieve even browning and a crisp crust. 🍞

Add garlic

Give ChatGPT your current recipe as well your take on what optimal bread tastes like, then take that advice for your next bake

Try baking a little more "bien cuit". If the image is indicative, your loaves may be quite "blonde".

put ketchup and cheese on it

Make naan bread, an easy-to-make bread

Do all the changes in the top 5 open options by probability, excluding this option

Add slurs to it

Brush on an egg wash

Don't eat anything for at least 48 hours before eating the bread

Ask ChatGPT (GPT-5, with thinking enabled) for suggestions on improving the bread, with this market description, then do all of them.

Just freeze the ready bread, then slowly bake it until it’s hot inside. It will give you a crustier crumb, contain less moisture, and taste better.

Make the bread taste good

Bake for 15 more minutes

Invest in a "Bakers Steel" for better heat retention and oven spring. It would mean graduating from a dutch oven though.

If your city uses artesian water, replace plastic bottled water with tap water. It will add natural, healthy alkalinity to your bread.

Don't eat anything for at least 24 hours before eating the bread

Watch the video

Ditch current process, do everything the same as the video

Bread flour, 3x yeast, cut rise to ~3h

Eat the bread while punching @realDonaldTrump in the face

Eat the bread while watching your mana balance steadily tick to (M)0

Throw the bread at a telescope

Cut bread into loaves before serving

Cut bread into ≤0.4inch slices, toast before serving

Invite your taste-testers to make the bread with you

Tarriff the bread-making process with a 10% reduction of all ingredients where actual physical money is required to purchase them, until it “shrinkflates,” but try to keep the same volume. Do not reduce any free ingredients.

Standardize a separate list of process features to keep track of independently of all other tests and use the cross entropy method to tune them to maximize your bread preference

Add 2 tbsp vanilla cake mix

Use soda instead of water (clear, orange, yellow, etc. soda is ok. Don’t use a purple/brown soda as that would make it not look good)

Taste the bread

Substitute 75 g of your flour with spelt flour

Don't automatically "Heat water to 30±1 °C". Instead, aim for a desired dough temperature (DDT) of 25-26°C. 30°C water is too hot for summer, and potentially too cool for winter.

Add melatonin to the bread and eat before you sleep (do safely)

While the bread is baking, tip every user who voted "Yes" on this option 25 Mana

Use a food-grade, human-approved vitamin D supplement in the correct dosage for testers with vitamin D deficiency

Use a convection oven/setting

Add 1/2 scoop whey protein powder

Give Gemini your current recipe as well your take on what optimal bread tastes like, then take that advice for your next bake

Add 6.25±1.25 g lemon juice when mixing in water to yeast and salt jug

Replace part of the flour in the dough with freshly crushed hemp seeds. It will make the bread a little bit sweeter, especially appealing for Canadians.

Buy bread from a michelin star restaurant.

Only use tap water from specifically New York City

Make the bread great again

Decompose it into infinite spheres, then a few parts per sphere, rotate the spheres by arccos(1/3), unite them and you will find 2 chilis (Banach-Tarski)

Bake the Manifold Crane into the Bread

Make the bread edible then throw it in

Drink vodka while eating the bread

Do FOLDED

Quit Manifold into the bread.

Kill the bread into Manifold.

Assume the chili is not in the interval [0,1], square it for more chili, if it is in (0,1), take the square root, else (equals 0 or 1) add 1 to it.

Assume the chili is in the interval (0,1), square it for less chili, if it is in (1,infinity) take the square root, if it is in (-infinity,0) take the negative of the square of the of the chile, else (equals 0 or 1) subtract 1 from it.

Add a tablespoon of sugar

Bake one more minute

replace 10% of flour with farina bona

Grind/powderize all salt used into a fine powder (with pestle & mortar or similar device)

Instead of RO water, use lightly rusty water to improve the nutritional value of the bread with soluble iron.

Ask yourself if bread is healthier than fruits? No need to improve my bread

Resolve at least one thing here yes or no while baking bread

Wear a suit while baking the cake.

Encourage people to participate in the market in good faith while making the bread

Replace salt with sugar

Bake the bread into a fun shape, like a fish, or an octagon

A system view is more appropriate. This is a dynamic, multi-variate, biological and chemical system. For e.g. conditioning salt % AND yeast % AND water temperature based on ingredient and ambient temps.

Replace 10% of flour with milled wheat bran

Put a baking rack in the Dutch oven before putting the loaf in, raising the loaf off the floor and lofting it over a layer of air.

Use flour made from an unconventional grain e.g. barley, millet, oats, rye, sorghum, maize etc.

Cover bread with damp paper towel instead of initial water spritz. Rehydrate paper towel during 2nd spritz. Remove paper towel before placing on cooling rack.

Strawberry jelly filling

Replace 600+/-5g water with 600+/-50g water (eyeball rather than carefully measure)

Have someone sell the bread to you at an expensive price

Add 1/2 cup yogurt to the bread and name the bread “gurt” while addressing it with “yo, gurt”.

Get your friends to help you make a batch ten times the size, but add a Pepper X (2.7M Scoville heat units) to the mixture

Mail the bread to 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. Washington D.C.

Ship a piece of the bread to a random person.

Frost it and put sprinkles on it to make it a birthday cake.

Make all of the ingredients from scratch.

Improve the bread

Quadruple salt

Bake your social security number into it.

Bake one fewer minute

Want to improve the value of your bread? Simply bake a piece of gold into it

Bake the cake while wearing a onesie.

Pray to your preferred agricultural/food deity before baking and before eating

Only buy ingredients from 7/11.

Cook the bread with a rod/puck of aluminum foil (or similar) in the core in an attempt to conduct heat through the center of the bread, cooking it evenly like a doughnut.

Test/filter the water for heavy metals

Eat the bread in front of the White House.

Implement all options that resolved NO

Make the bread inedible then throw it out.

Throw the bread at @realDonaldTrump

Force Feed it to @realDonaldTrump

Add as many Jack Daniel's whiskey barrel smoking chips as feasible to the Dutch oven before baking, physically separating them from the bread as necessary while baking.

Add caffeine to the bread

Cut the bread into the number of traders in the market slices.

make the bread bounce

Implementing every element listed below.

Put a non-lethal dose of any rat poison.

Just make donuts instead

Bake it in an easy bake kids oven

Use a plastic baking sheet.

Eat the bread while betting yes on Cuomo on Manifold

Double oven temperature

Bake the bread very thin and add food coloring to make it have the US flag. Don’t allow it to touch the ground, illuminate at night, fold 13 times properly, and pledge allegiance before eating.

Don’t use usual water (room temperature) for the dough - that water’s only for toilets. Use electrolyte drinks instead with ice cubes; they make the dough taste better and add extra nutrition.

Light it on fire with birthday candles.

Bake it with a microwave

Halve oven temperature

Eat the bread while betting yes on Mamdani on Manifold

Step on it

Bring it to Yemen and put a bomb in it

Bake America Great Again

Give the bread a name in a ritual ceremony and baptise it, with pre-blessed holy water if a priest isn't available

Sacrifice a lamb

Add MAGA and a splash of Trump juice

Use lemonade instead of water.

Bake in a cat and a dog

Explode it:

5 parts cyanide/ 1 part water/ 1 part sand

say 6 7 67 times before making the bread

Take a fat dump in the dough

Sit in dough 24 hrs

Replace flour with flowers

Let dough sit 24 hrs

Mix half sodium/potassium chloride

Add 2g? of baking soda

Bake in rectangular tin

Add 50g vital wheat gluten

double yeast

halve salt

Double salt

Add 2tsp olive oil

Refrigerate dough instead of room temp wait

Start at 500F, drop to 450F and uncover half way through

Do not mix salt and yeast in water together

Autolyse 20 minutes

Let dough rise on counter only until double volume or 2h max, any time longer in fridge

Think positive thoughts before tasting

Put fork in microwave

Don't eat anything for at least 12 hours before eating the bread

Add 2tbsp vanilla extract

Play classical music while baking

Add a pinch of sugar

Bake on upside-down sheet pan, covered with Dutch oven

Eat the bread with friends

Bake vegimite into it.

Bake vodka into it

Bake it in the country you were born in.

Let dough sit 48 hrs

Resolve this option YES while eating the bread

Ditch all the steps. Just buy the bread from the supermarket

Eat the bread over the course of a week.

Bake for 5 fewer minutes

Use 50% whole grain flour

Bake the bread with love

Use King Arthur Bread Flour instead of All-Purpose

Add sawdust to increase the volume of the bread (but only like 10% sawdust by volume max. maybe 20% if it's good sawdust)

More steam! Either spritz with more water (preferably hot) or actually pour some boiling water in just before closing the lid.

Resolve this option NO while eating the bread

Incorporate a whole grain flour (buckwheat for example)

Add 50g sugar

Add 50g honey

Swap 200ml water for milk

Make a poolish 12 h ahead: 100 g flour + 100 g water + 0.8 g yeast (0.1 %). After it ferments, use this poolish in place of 100 g flour and 100 g water in the final dough.

Add an amount of MSG equivalent to half the current salt content

Eat the bread while sending all your mana to @realDonaldTrump

Add banana

Add poppy seeds

10/31 Halloween

12/25 Christmas

Thanksgiving

Easter

11/03 U.S. Election Day

06/** Pride Month

Fall equinox (or fall in general)

Winter Solstice (or winter in general)

12/31 New Year's Eve

03/14 Pi Day

Any Manifest

04/01 April Fools Day

Cortina Winter Olympics

Saint Patrick's Day

The Oscars

05/27 Memorial Day

07/04 U.S. Independence Day

05/04 Star Wars Day

03/08 International Women's Day

Juneteenth

Spring equinox (or spring in general)

04/22 Earth Day

Mother's Day

Father's Day

Labor Day

11/11 Veterans Day/Armistice Day

05/05 Cinco de Mayo

Other

[None - Position will cease to exist]

Mira Murati

Elon Musk

Sam Altman

Greg Brockman

Bret Taylor

Larry Summers

Adam D'Angelo

Andrej Karpathy

Eric Schmidt

Paul Graham

Peter Thiel

Wojciech Zaremba

Ben Horowitz

Jessica Livingston

Marc Benioff

Sheryl Sandberg

Tim Cook

John Doerr

Reed Hastings

Fei Fei Lee

Alexander Wang

George Hotz

Brad Lightcap

Bob Mcgrew

Peter Welinder

Jason Kwon

Mark Chen

Helen Toner

Ilya Sutskever

Emmett Shear

Dario Amodei

Satya Nadela

Jeff Bezos

Demis Hassabis

Robin Li

Clément Delangue

Lila Ibrahim

Alex Karp

Reid Hoffman

Raquel Urtasun

Marc Andreessen

Aidan Gomez

Sandra Rivera

Gary Marcus

Jaime Teevan

Sundar Pichai

Jack Clark

Anna Makanju

Shane Legg

Andrew Ng

Pushmeet Kohli

Yann LeCun

Mark Zuckerberg

Yoshua Bengio

Hinton

Marissa Mayer

Spencer Rascoff

it exists

uploaded onto youtube

uses royalty-free music

has hard coded subtitles on at least 1 frame

sex scene

Fails the bechdel test

It contains the exact line, "All this time, we've been thinking rationally, when we should have been thinking rationalussy."

runtime of at least 10 minutes

Wario appears in the movie at least once

features AI-generated video

Rana (or a character clearly inspired by Rana) appears in a role with dialogue

there's multiple actors

Rana voices a character

The current summary from the Rationalussy Wiki is "shockingly accurate", as judged by @PlasmaBallin

it's debuted during Summer Camp or Manifest (2024)

Other

Ilya Sutskever

Eliezer Yudkowsky

Demis Hassabis

Dario Amodei

Rich Sutton

Paul Christiano

Sam Altman

Geoffrey Hinton

Robert Miles

Yann LeCun

Marc Andreessen

Larry Summers

Émile Torres

Joe Biden

Longstanding Supreme court precedent reversed

Paul hates the song of the summer

Charlie Puth makes a song that i actually love

I hit a parlay

Justin Timberlake!

USA Border expansion or new territory

Zohran Mamdani raps again

Obama Dunks

Victoria's Secret goes bankrupt

Cooper Flagg drops 50

Surprise Snoop Album

I get into F1

Joey Chestnut loses

World's largest quesadilla

World's first trillionaire

Taylor Swift Pregnant

Doo Wop music makes a comeback

Post Malone X Olivia Rodrigo

Pete Hegseth Gay???

Legitimate pandemic scare not taken serious

SpongeBob Dies

Random new 'stan' country

4+ Red cards in an Atletico Madrid game

Trump hits the hard "r"

Other

Adam d'Angelo

Bret Taylor

Sundar Pichai

Katie Ledecky

Leon Marchand

Summer McIntosh

Sydney McLaughlin-Levrone

Bobby Finke

Amit Elor

Grant Holloway

Quincy Wilson

Torri Huske

Lee Kiefer

Ryan Crouser

Valerie Allman

Gabby Thomas

Rai Benjamin

Gretchen Walsh

Letsile Tebogo

Tara Davis-Woodhall

Noah Lyles

Sha'Carri Richardson

Kate Douglass

Katie Grimes

Regan Smith

Simone Biles

Suni Lee

Public AGI Deployment

Ice-free Arctic Summer

Summer 2025

Fall 2025

Spring 2026