The Police News

Post a Tweet

Deny Climate Change

Promote the product of a supporter from the Oval Office

Withdraw the US from the Paris Climate Agreement

Bomb Iran

Increase US oil production

Pardon a person convicted of a violent crime against police (e.g. January 6 insurrectionists)

Appoint a federal judge who is rated NQ (Not Qualified) by the American Bar Association

Enrich himself & his family financially

Shake hands with Putin

Call a national emergency for a non-foreign affairs issue

Post on Social Media that the DOJ should investigate somebody who is subsequently investigated by the DOJ

Reverse Biden's executive order on AI

Start a war

Play golf

Visit a golf course more than 10% of the days he spends in office

Shake hands with Xi Jinping

Have to have the VP (or someone else) be acting president for any amount of time

Exercise

Detain large numbers of legal immigrants as part of a program ostensibly targeting illegal immigrants

Attend at least one current state leader funeral

Fire someone he nominated to a government position via social media (“fired by tweet”)

Threaten a world leader with nuclear attack

Sign bills with a Sharpie or similar

Question the effectiveness or safety of vaccines in general

Appoint a Justice to the Supreme Court

Suggest his face should be added to mount rushmore

Visit a golf course more than 20% of the days he spends in office

Comment Publicly on the Investment Merits of DJT Stock

Get impeached

Authorize or explicitly endorse violence against peaceful protesters

Suppress, censor, or shut down any US news media outlet (including websites)

Shake hands with Donald Tusk

Pardon himself

Have a net approval below -20% at any point

Withdraw support for Ukraine

Suggests in a speech or verified written format that Cuba join as a state

Pardon someone with the last name Trump (excluding himself)

Trumped-Up Charges: Trump appoints an Attorney General whose office goes on to seek a criminal indictment against ex-President Joseph Biden.

Leave office early

Advocate or support a genocide (anywhere in the world)

Attempt to stay in power for a third term

Order the US military to attack US citizens on US soil

End SBA direct lending

Use the powers of his office to hurt Elon Musk's competitors

Reference "Situational Awareness"

Be the subject of a successful invocation of the 25th amendment

Eat a hamnhrb

Pass away

Attempt or claim to seize direct military control of DC via the Insurrection Act, martial law, or similar

Pardon SBF

Make America Great Again

Register with the Federal Election Commission to run for president

Die

Order a nuclear strike

Declassify the existence of non human intelligence.

Instruct the military to fire on protesters with live bullets, leading to at least one death

Talk with Kim Jong Un face to face

Make an executive order with the stated intention of slowing down AI development

Order the extrajudicial killing of a (named) US citizen on US soil

Eliminate Daylight Savings Time

Initiate tariffs that would apply to GPUs from Taiwan

Ban TikTok

Withdraw the US from NATO

Signs a bill that admits a new state to the Union.

Order the extrajudicial killing of any federal or state elected official

Completely withdraw United States Forces Korea

Cry on camera

Here's Johnny: Trump again appoints John Bolton to an official position in his administration.

Be in some type of official captivity at any level before the end of the planned term in 2029

Have over +20 net approval according to 538, at any point

Direct the killing of a political opponent

Be removed via the 25th Amendment

Do another Home Alone cameo

Buy Greenland

NO

YES

Any Trump family member

Himself

Any cryptocurrency executives or blockchain industry figures

Any law enforcement officials accused of police brutality or misconduct

Any members of his second term cabinet

Any cryptocurrency or tech industry founders

Any member of the armed forces for conduct reported as a potential war crime

Any members of Trump's legal team or personal attorneys

Any state-level Republican officials

Any anti-abortion activists or religious conservative figures

Sam Bankman-Fried

Edward Snowden

Any sitting Democratic Governor, Senator, or Congressman

Diddy

Ghislaine Maxwell

Golden Age

Defund the police

Failed state

Fuck (or variant)

Fish

Jesus Christ

Cocaine

Newscum

Third term

Massive fraud

Election interference

World War 3 or WW3 (or any other variant)

Shithole (or variant)

25th Amendment (or twenty fifth amendment or any other variant)

Jew hater or Jew haters

Meth

Fifth Column (or any variation)

Dumocrat

Divorce

Penis (or variant)

Shit (or variant)

Peace president

Be cool

Moist

Nuclear fusion

Drake

“Sabrina” or “Carpenter”

Ghislaine

Pussy (or variant)

Trans agenda

Delve

Eswatini

Cock (or variant)

Republic of America

Feckless

Associate/informant provides suspect’s name

Security/doorbell camera footage leading to identification

DNA match from evidence

Suspect voluntarily surrenders

Social media post or online confession leads to identification

Ballistics trace links weapon to suspect

Fingerprint match from evidence

Public tip to police (hotline/Crimestoppers)

Facial recognition match

Cellphone location/records analysis identifies suspect

International cooperation

Automated license plate reader or traffic camera hit

Identified while seeking medical treatment

Undercover operation or sting identifies suspect

Identified during a routine traffic stop or unrelated arrest

NO

NO

NO

00

06

05

07

08

2

Other

4

09

10

11

12

13

YES

YES