Chao News

Other

Nikolai Patrushev

Mikhail Mishustin

Dmitry Medvedev

Chaos - no clear controller of Moscow

Aleksey Dyumin

Sergei Shoigu

Aleksandr Bortnikov

Sergey Naryshkin

Sergei Sobyanin

Ramzan Kadyrov

Alexey Navalny

Ernie

Joshua

Chris/Strutheo

Jensen Huang

Sundar Pichai

Larry Page

Sergey Brin

Bill Gates

Bram Cohen

Vitalik Buterin

Demis Hassabis

Lex Fridman

Xi Jinping

Kim Jong Un

Jeff Dean

Isaac King

Geoffrey Hinton

Eliezer Yudkowsky

Ilya Sutskever

Austin (manifold)

Glenn Shotwell

Emad Mostaque

Greg Brockman

Bruce Schneier

AGM (chaos monkey)

Kind Edward

Patrick Collison

Balaji

Stewart Butterfeld

Prince Harry

Tim Sweeney

Peter Thiel

Garry Tan

Jessica Livingston

Andrew Ng

Robin Hanson

Trump

Dwarkesh Patel

Marc Andreesen

Larry Ellison

Grimes

Patrick McKenzie

Travis Kalanick

Lionel Messi

James (manifold)

Biden

Mark Zuckerberg

JK Rowling

Meghan Markle

Gavin Newsom

Prince William

Jack Dorsey

Martin Shkreli

Tyler Cowen

Oprah Winfrey

Paul Graham

Beff Jezos

Tim Ferriss

Elon Musk

Satya Nadella

Taylor Swift

Sam Altman

Joe Rogan

Aliens

EY's mind changes such that a boring explanation is worldview-shattering

EY suffers severe mental degeneration leading to delusions

Eliezer knows aliens are real and will be disclosed soon. He's rallying people to dump money into a bet he is secretly betting against to teach them about the fallacy of appeal to authority.

Simulation Hypothesis

Demons (as in a traditional Abrahamic religion)

UFOs are time travelers

Holographic Principle

UFOs are angels

UFOs are psychic manifestations

Idealism (Consciousness underpins physical reality)

Other

UFOs are a product of a massive conspiracy unrelated to non-human entities

Ultraterrestrials (home-grown, advanced non-human civs, hidden from us)

UFOs are part of/directed by a superintelligence

AI is harder than practical interstellar travel

UFOs are aliens intentionally both hiding themselves and revealing themselves to sow chaos

Tortaria

Hunan Bistro

Joe's Pizza (14th + 3rd)

Mighty Quinn's BBQ (13th and 7th)

Hill Country

Carlotto

Dominic Ansel Workshop

BLT Prime (74th + Lexington)

Brooklyn Bagel & Coffee Company (25th + 8th)

Thai Villa

Bhatti Indian Grill

Brindle Room

Osteria Morini

Il Buco Alimentari & Vineria

Tao Downtown

Strip House (44th + 5th)

Keste Pizza

Magnolia Bakery (Bleecker Street)

Joe and Pat's NYC (10th + 1st)

Bourke Street Bakery (28th + Madison)

Prince Street Pizza

Dominic Ansel Kitchen

Au Za'atar

Rezdora

Da Umberto

Casa Mono

Xi'an's Famous Foods (15th and 8th)

The Donut Pub (both locations must close)

Dos Toros (two closest locations must close)

Scarpetta

Via Carota

Fogo De Chao (53rd Street)

The Halal Guys (14th + 2nd)

Japonica

Fiaschetteria "Pistoia" (both locations must close)

Eataly (23rd Street + 6th Avenue)

Naya (four closest locations must close)

Katz's Delicatessen

Knuckles the Echidna

Miles “Tails” Prower

Metal Sonic

Sonic the Hedgehog - voiced by Ben Schwartz

Dr. Robotnik - Jim Carrey portrays some Eggman / clone / impersonator

Tom “Donut Lord” Wachowski

Maddie “Pretzel Lady” Wachowski

Agent Stone

Dr. Robotnik - confirmed to be Eggman and not a clone / impersonator

Ozzy the Golden Retriever

Iblis

Sonic the Hedgehog - Super Form

Wade Whipple

Big the Cat

Gerald Robotnik

Rouge the Bat

Amy Rose

Cream the Rabbit

Metal Sonic - specifically Neo Metal or Metal Overlord Form

Silver the Hedgehog

Longclaw the Owl

Jack Sinclair

Shadow the Hedgehog - confirmed to be the original Shadow

‘Ugly Sonic’ - a character whose appearance clearly alludes to the pre-backlash 2020 design

Blaze the Cat

Chaos

Chief Pachacamac

Tikal the Echidna

Shadow the Hedgehog - confirmed to be a clone or impersonator

Sonic the Hedgehog - two Sonics (not impersonators) interact with each other as a result of time / space shenanigans

Vector the Crocodile

Espio the Chameleon

Charmy Bee

Eggman Nega

Mephiles the Dark

Zavok ❤️

Infinite the Jackal

Mighty the Armadillo

Sonic the Hedgehog - Werehog Form

Max Verstappen drives at least one race for RBR in 2026

Christian Horner TP at another F1 team by start of 2026 season

Laurent Mekies still RBR TP by July 9th 2026

RBR wins another WDC or WCC before 2036

Jonathan Wheatley returns to RBR by 2027

Helmut Marko leaves RBR before 2027

🧠⚠️ Misaligned goals — AGI misunderstands human values and acts against our interests.

🕵️‍♂️💣 Used by bad actors — hackers, authoritarian regimes, or terrorists weaponize AGI.

🎮❌ Loss of control — humans can't predict or stop AGI’s actions anymore.

🌳💥 Environmental harm — AGI decisions damage ecosystems or speed up climate change.

💼📉 Job loss & chaos — AGI wipes out jobs, leading to mass instability.

Other

🌐🤝 No global coordination — nations or companies rush ahead without cooperation.

👺🐒 Humans are evil — AGI can only align the universe by destroying us.

🤯🔀 Unintended consequences — AGI does something harmful without meaning to.

🛑🔧 Weak safety protocols — not enough safeguards or oversight before release.

🚀💡 Runaway self-improvement — AGI upgrades itself faster than humans can follow.

After 2100/ Never (fundamental atmospheric chaos prevents this level of accuracy)

Before 2040

Before 2060

Before 2100

NO

Completion (Status Quo): Finishes term; no major political victories or failures occur.

Completion + Political Prosecution: Finishes term and a high-profile political opponent is convicted or imprisoned before January 1, 2030.

Completion + Charter Change (Cha-Cha): Finishes term and the Constitution is successfully amended/ratified.

Completion + Popularity Surge: Finishes term and his final net approval rating is above 60%.

Completion + Geopolitical Victory: Finishes term and achieves a formal, diplomatic, or legal victory in the West Philippine Sea.

Completion + Succession Path: Finishes term and a key member of the Marcos-Romualdez bloc is elected to the Vice Presidency or Senate Presidency by June 30, 2028.

Completion + External War/Victory: Finishes term and successfully navigates a short, decisive external conflict, resulting in a clear geopolitical victory by June 2028.

Completion + Internal Stabilization: Finishes term and achieves a definitive peace agreement or complete military defeat of all major internal insurgency groups by June 2028.

Completion + AI Governance Success: Finishes term and the Philippines becomes an internationally recognized leader in AI governance or ethical adoption, significantly attracting foreign investment by June 2028.

Completion + AI Economic Boom: Finishes term and the economic boost from AI integration (as a percentage of GDP growth) demonstrably meets or exceeds the most optimistic projections (e.g., $92 Billion estimate) by the end of his term.

Removal by Impeachment (Corruption): Term ends due to being successfully convicted on grounds of Graft and Corruption.

Removal by Impeachment (Betrayal of Trust): Term ends due to being successfully convicted on grounds of Betrayal of Public Trust.

Removal by People Power / Junta: Term ends due to a successful People Power mobilization or a military coup/junta.

Removal by Supreme Court: Term ends via a Supreme Court ruling (e.g., a successful quo warranto petition) that invalidates his election or eligibility.

Removal by Death, Disability, or Resignation: Term ends due to health reasons or voluntary resignation.

Removal by Secession / Government Collapse: Term is rendered invalid due to the successful secession of a major region (e.g., Mindanao).

Removal by External War/Loss: Term ends early due to a major external conflict (e.g., WPS conflict) that leads to significant political destabilization and his removal.

Removal by Internal War/Chaos: Term ends early due to a major internal civil conflict or renewed, large-scale insurgency.

Removal by AI Disinformation Crisis: Term ends early due to a widespread, uncontained AI-driven disinformation crisis (e.g., deepfake scandals) that completely erodes public trust and leads to institutional failure and early removal.

Removal by AI Job Disruption: Term ends early due to massive, immediate job displacement from rapid AI automation, leading to widespread social unrest, economic collapse, and his removal.

Extension by Con-Ass: 8-Year Term Congress (Con-Ass) amends the Constitution to change the single 6-year term to a single 8-year term.

Extension by Con-Con: Parliamentary Shift Constitutional Convention changes the system to Parliamentary, making the incumbent Prime Minister with a flexible term.

Extension by Federalism Transitional Clause: A new Federal Constitution is passed, with a clause designating the incumbent as the Transitional President for two additional years.

Extension by SC Rules on Term Interruption: The Supreme Court rules that the current term was interrupted by a crisis, legally restarting the 6-year clock.

Extension by Legislative Deferment of Polls: Congress passes a simple law postponing the 2028 election due to logistics or calamity.

Extension by Emergency Declaration: The President declares a severe National Emergency (non-war) and Congress concurs, suspending the election.

Extension by New Statutory Office Creation: Congress creates a powerful new, non-constitutional role (e.g., Chief Development Officer) with a long statutory term for the incumbent.

Extension by Succession Incapacit Legal/political chaos incapacitates all legal successors (VP, etc.), forcing the incumbent to hold over.

Extension by Election Invalidation: A court ruling or technicality voids the 2028 election, forcing the incumbent to remain until a valid re-run.

Extension by Cabinet Appointment: The incumbent resigns, the successor is sworn in, and immediately appoints the former President to a powerful, unelected executive post that maintains command.