THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT News

Taylor Swift dies

The Winds of Winter (Game of Thrones 6th Novel) is Published

Puerto Rico becomes a (US) State

Taylor Swift dates somebody who does not identify as a man

A woman is president of the United States

Taylor Swift goes to Space

China full-scale invades Taiwan

Taylor Swift performs at the Super Bowl

Reputation (TV) is released

A United States presidential candidate endorsed by Taylor Swift gets elected

Taylor Swift releases her "Taylor Swift" album rerecord

Nate Silver wins a WSOP Bracelet

Travis Kelce wins a fourth Super Bowl

The Buffalo Bills beat the Kansas City Chiefs in the playoffs

A Non-QB wins the NFL MVP award

King Charles III ceases to be the King of the UK (or England, if the UK is broken up)

Songs on Midnights reach 20 Billion total streams

Taylor Swift does not have a live performance for a period of at least 2 years

Destiny is unbanned from Twitch

Obergefell is effectively overturned by the Supreme Court

Steven "Destiny" Kenneth Bonnell II gets remarried

GameStop files for Bankruptcy

The UN has a new member state

There is an official Russia Ukraine peace treaty

Any United States current or former president dies (after Jimmy Carter)

Nine months prior to the birth of Taylor Swift’s first child

Cannabis is Federally Legalized

Steven "Destiny" Kenneth Bonnell II appears on "The Joe Rogan Experience"

The United States reports a Recession

A Supreme Court justice dies or announces retirement

Travis Kelce Retires From the NFL

Songs on The Tortured Poets Department reach 10 Billion total streams

The Carolina Panthers clinch a playoff berth

A major Philadelphia sports team (NFL, NBA, NHL, MLB) wins a championship

Jimmy Carter Dies

The Same Party Controls the U.S. House, Senate and Presidency

Taylor Swift releases 2 new (non-rerecord) albums

Taylor Swift gets engaged

Taylor Swift attends a Super Bowl won by the Kansas City Chiefs

Pope Francis ceases to be Pope

death stranding 2 releases

bitcoin reaches 80k

end of Blue Monday 2025 (jan 15)

Next President is sworn in ( even if it's Biden )

Silksong

mr beast hits 250M subs on youtube

Alec Baldwin case ends

Trump running mate announced

2024 election is called by AP

Slay the Spire 2 releases on steam early access

The Federal Reserve decreases interest rates

gta 6 releases

Andrew Tate found guilty of a crime

Joe Biden passes away or is murdered

Solar panels removed from the White House (again).

tortured poet's department releases

the end of manifest 2024

the start of manifest 2024

Lantern bioworks Lumina treatment given FDA approval for something

julian Assange extradited to usa

Saudi Arabia recognizes Israel

spiderman beyond the spiderverse releases

he outlives inflation in the usa (trailing 12 month CPI increase less than 2% before he dies)

Cannabis is removed from Schedule 1

The official name of Elder Scrolls 6 is announced

Windows 12 released

the ukraine russia war ends

human walks on the moon again

The last case of Guinea worm in humans

binance cease operating

trump found guilty of a crime

azerbaijian invades armenia

destiny goes on joe rogan

Ukraine joins NATO

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