NFC News

At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose

Punt or Kick Return Touchdown

Safety Scored

A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury

Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game

Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game

Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game

For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name

Any team scores 24+ points before halftime

A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)

A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)

Any team scores 40+ points

Scorigami

Pick Six

35% or higher Kick Return rate

Any 400 yard passer

At least one missed kicking extra point attempt

2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week

A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts

Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)

For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?

4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped

Shutout

Overtime

Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games

Will a championship belt change teams?*

AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back

All Starting Rookie QBs lose

All Starting Rookie QBs win

Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes

Any Double Digit Underdog Wins

Fake Punt

Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game

Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT

Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses

A player gets an Octopus

MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)

Highest Scoring Game of the Season (so far)*

Fat Guy Touchdown*

A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)

Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)

A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points

A 4th and 11+ is converted*

California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)

At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards

Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out

Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game

3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game

NFC West: San Francisco 49ers

AFC South: Jacksonville Jaguars

AFC West: Kansas City Chiefs

AFC East: Buffalo Bills

AFC North: Baltimore Ravens

NFC East: Dallas Cowboys

NFC South: Carolina Panthers

NFC North: Minnesota Vikings

AFC East: New England Patriots

AFC West: Denver Broncos

AFC North: Cincinnati Bengals

NFC East: New York Giants

NFC North: Detroit Lions

NFC South: Atlanta Falcons

AFC South: Houston Texans

NFC North: Chicago Bears

NFC South: New Orleans Saints

NFC East: Philadelphia Eagles

NFC West: Seattle Seahawks

AFC North: Pittsburgh Steelers

NFC South: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

NFC West: Los Angeles Rams

NFC East: Washington Commanders

NFC North: Green Bay Packers

AFC South: Indianapolis Colts

AFC North: Cleveland Browns

AFC West: Las Vegas Raiders

AFC East: New York Jets

AFC South: Tennessee Titans

AFC West: Los Angeles Chargers

AFC East: Miami Dolphins

Scores over 23.5 points in Week 1

Wins a preseason game

Starting QB missed a game due to injury.

Starts season with Brandon Aiyuk

Wins a game by 25+ points

The team moves or is renamed before 2050

Any player is an MVP finalist

Any player wins MVP, OPOY, or DPOY

Shanahan is COY

Drafts at least one QB in the NFL Draft

Christian McCaffrey plays at least 12 games

2 wide receivers each have over 1000 receiving yards

Finish 24/25 regular season with a positive Rush EPA

Wins NFC West

Gets #1 Seed

Plays in NFCCG

Trade Deebo Samuel before the season ends.

Plays in a wildcard playoff round game

Enters the playoffs as a wildcard team

35% or higher Kick Return rate

At least one missed kicking extra point attempt

Any team scores 24+ points before halftime

Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out

Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT

Any team scores 40+ points

At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose

Pick Six

Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game

Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes

Safety Scored

California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)

A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts

Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game

Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)

Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses

A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)

MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)

Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)

Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games

2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week

Will a championship belt change teams?*

A 4th and 11+ is converted*

At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards

Overtime

4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped

Punt or Kick Return Touchdown

Fake Punt

For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name

For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?

AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back

A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points

All Starting Rookie QBs lose

The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number

A player gets an Octopus

A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)

Fat Guy Touchdown*

Any 400 yard passer

Shutout

A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)

3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game

Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game

Scorigami

A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury

Any Double Digit Underdog Wins

Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game

Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game

All Starting Rookie QBs win

35% or higher Kick Return rate

At least one missed kicking extra point attempt

Any team scores 24+ points before halftime

Pick Six

Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game

Any team scores 40+ points

Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game

At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose

Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes

Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT

Punt or Kick Return Touchdown

A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts

3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game

Safety Scored

AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back

Fake Punt

Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game

MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)

Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)

Any 400 yard passer

Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games

2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week

Will a championship belt change teams?*

A 4th and 11+ is converted*

California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)

At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards

Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)

For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?

Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out

4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped

Overtime

Lateral caught at least 1 yard beyond the line of scrimmage (per gamebook) (non-last play of the game)

All Starting Rookie QBs lose

For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name

Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses

A player gets an Octopus

A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points

The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number

Fat Guy Touchdown*

Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game

A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)

A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)

Scorigami

All Starting Rookie QBs win

Shutout

A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury

Any Double Digit Underdog Wins

Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game

35% or higher Kick Return rate

At least one missed kicking extra point attempt

Any team scores 24+ points before halftime

Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out

Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT

Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game

At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose

Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game

Any team scores 40+ points

Pick Six

Overtime

Safety Scored

California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)

At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards

Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes

AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back

Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game

For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name

Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses

A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)

Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)

Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games

2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week

Will a championship belt change teams?*

A 4th and 11+ is converted*

Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)

For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?

4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped

Punt or Kick Return Touchdown

A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points

A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts

The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number

Fake Punt

A player gets an Octopus

MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)

Fat Guy Touchdown*

All Starting Rookie QBs lose

3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game

A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)

A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)

Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game

Shutout

Any Double Digit Underdog Wins

A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury

Any 400 yard passer

Scorigami

All Starting Rookie QBs win

Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game

35% or higher Kick Return rate

At least one missed kicking extra point attempt

Any team scores 24+ points before halftime

Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out

Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT

Any team scores 40+ points

Pick Six

At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose

Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game

Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes

A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts

Safety Scored

Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game

California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)

Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)

Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses

MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)

Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)

Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games

2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week

Will a championship belt change teams?*

A 4th and 11+ is converted*

At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards

Overtime

4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped

Punt or Kick Return Touchdown

Fake Punt

For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name

For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?

AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back

A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points

All Starting Rookie QBs lose

The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number

A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)

A player gets an Octopus

Fat Guy Touchdown*

Any 400 yard passer

3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game

A lateral more than a yard past the line of scrimmage (non-last play of the game)

Shutout

Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game

A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)

Any Double Digit Underdog Wins

A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury

Scorigami

Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game

Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game

All Starting Rookie QBs win

35% or higher Kick Return rate

At least one missed kicking extra point attempt

Largest FG made is from 57+ yards out

At Least 4 Favored Teams Lose

Any team scores 24+ points before halftime

Pick Six

Quarterback throws at least 4 Touchdowns in a game

Any team scores 40+ points

Score as time expires in the 4th Quarter/OT

Punt or Kick Return Touchdown

Game Winning Drive starting in the last 2 Minutes

Fake Punt

Taylor Swift in Attendance to Any Game

3 Missed FGs or Extra Points (from both teams combined) in a Game

Safety Scored

AFC or NFC Offensive Player of the Week is a Running Back

Player Records at least 2 Interceptions in a Game

Any player throws for more than 350 yards and loses

MVP Favorite Changes by Wednesday (Josh Allen)

Bird teams finish with a better record than Cat teams (Win %)

Any 400 yard passer

Team change in top 5 Super Bowl favorites from previous Wednesday to Wednesday after the weeks games

2 Point Conversions convert at 50% or higher for the Week

Will a championship belt change teams?*

A 4th and 11+ is converted*

California Teams (Chargers, Rams, 49ers) finish the week with a better record than New York State teams (Bills, Jets, Giants)

At least 5 QBs throw for 300+ yards

Any player scores 3 TDs in a game (non-passing)

For each game, take the GCD of both teams' scores. Is the result for any game at least 8?

All Starting Rookie QBs lose

4th and Goal from the 1 (or inches) stopped

Overtime

For each letter of the alphabet, at least one touchdown is scored by a player that has that letter in their first or last name

A QB has at least 2 turnovers and at least 4 TDs (including passing)

A QB has at least 3 turnovers and at least 3 TDs (including passing)

A prime number of total missed field goals + extra points

The player with the most passing yards wears a prime number

A player gets an Octopus

Fat Guy Touchdown*

Lateral caught at least 1 yard beyond the line of scrimmage (per gamebook) (non-last play of the game)

A Starting QB gets a likely Season Ending Injury

Quarterback gets benched in the middle of a game

A 1pm ET game is still going when a 4:25pm ET game starts

Shutout

All Starting Rookie QBs win

Scorigami

Any Double Digit Underdog Wins

Hip Drop Tackle penalty called during any game

YES

2

3

4

9

10

11 or more

Glass of Thrones letdown (polished)

Watching Harry Potter 1 on airplane and rewinding and quoting over and over the meme wizard chess section

Quick dialog sketch: "Oh my gosh a black cat, we're going to have so much bad luck now" "Wait you don't really believe in that kind of stuff do you?" "See look we're already fighting :("

Friend who took a long time in the bathroom

Coaching my girlfriend to queue up match highlights from another room to avoid spoilers

Spies when they accidentally bite the poison pill hidden in their tooth

Sketchy human ATM

Depression after a team I never heard of loses

Before Sunrise POV in record shop

Whatever the next clip of me doing standup is

Nervously removing a bunch of 'remove before flight' aviation tags from the counter of a helicopter tour company

Glass of Thrones letdown

Remembering that PBR was a thing

Gross side of owls delivering mail in the great hall

A compilation of OpenAI employees interrupting ChatGPT (and potentially gradually fading to a scene from terminator)

Demo of the new ChatGPT but it's way too flirty

Candy addiction hotline

Having a bone to pick with soccer players doing a “bow and arrow” celebration but letting go of the bow

Friend who thinks they're safety officer

Brainstorming how to become viral

Slytherin doing the math

Cheap Airbnb tour

American Express review

Future Me

How it feels logging in with authenticator (shot in the style of dramatically diffusing a bomb)

NFC Translation

Satire of sales ads

Saying "Damn" in front of a dam.

Every time I try to order a beer

Dreamy nonsensical philosophy shot